Camp WoodWard

Chapter nine

Lucas

What the hell was I thinking?
Why did I say that?
She tried to kill herself partly because of me.
I ruined EVERYTHING.

I should have stayed Calm and told her What really happened.

Tears were streaming down my face.
I couldn't stop them.

I wish I just had broke up with Haley before and ask Cassy out, but I was just too damn scared to fuck everything up.

And I didn't even visit her at the hospital.
I didn't want her to feel angry or sad again, but I was also scared.
Scared to face her. Scared to apologize.
Scared to screw up again. Scared to look bad in front of Cassy and her friends.

I sobbed and laid down on my bed.
I have never felt so much pain before.
I have never hurt someone that much before.

Fuck myself.
Fuck Haley.
Fuck life.

"Lucas?" The door opened.
I quickly wiped away my tears and sat up.
Haley sat down next to me.

"Why the hell did you do that, Haley?" I mumbled.
"Tell the truth, you mean?" She smirked.
I wanted to punch her so hard right now.

"How did you find out?" I made eye contact with her.
"I overheard you talking about it" She grinned.
"So you told the whole camp?!"

"I can't fucking believe you" I spat.
"She almost killed herself! You know What She's been through!" I balled my fists.
I felt so angry, I could explode.
"She deserved it!" She tried to defent herself.
"She was always disturbing us and She was always trying to steal you away from me!"

"So That's What all this is about! You were just fucking jelaous!" I shouted back.
"Well, guess what, Haley?! It's fucking over!"

Her jaw dropped.
Tears started to drip down from her eyes.
"But... You can't dump me, Lucas!" She begged.
"We are soulmates! I did this for us! We are going to the dance together and we'll be Happy forever!" She sobbed and grabbed my arm.
She leaned in for a kiss, but I pushed her away and ran out of the room.

I was going to ask Cassy to the dance, but it's too late now.
I felt things when I was with Cassy that I've never felt before.
She made my go wild, I struggled to find words and I felt so Happy.
I never wanted her to leave.
I loved to be her friend, but I wanted to be more.
I wanted her to be mine.
But now that I have shattered everything into tiny, tiny pieces, I realized how badly I wanted her.

(a/n: This is so cheesy, oh my god)

I sniffled.
I'm a fucking douchebag. A life-wrecker. A dream-crusher. A horrible friend.

I sat down in the wet grass.

Suddenly I heard distant girl voices.
I looked around.
Cassy and her friends had returned from the hospital.
She smiled a little. That was good.
She looked at me.
Looking into her eyes made the pain and guilt even stronger.

Her smile completely dropped and She looked away.

Maybe I should apologize?
But I don't want to screw up and make her do that again.
I should probably wait.

She'll never forgive me, and I completely understand Why.

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Hi<3

This chapter was short, so sorry for that.

Anna