Second Chance at Love

IV: The Talk

Wednesday June 15, 2012
Beyonce Giselle Knowles

It's been three months since I seen Shawn at the club. I don't know when he was coming home.

To be honest I do want to work things out with him, we have been through to much for me to let him go.

I've been with this man since I was seventeen.

Sure I had flings when Shawn and I were taking our breaks. But he's the only man I've ever loved.

Call me stupid or dumb but it's hard to turn your back on someone after all you've been through.

The door opened and closed, I stood up to see who it was and Shawn walked in.

"I didn't think you would be here." He said lowly not making eye contact.

"I can say the same about you." I replied smartly.

"We need to talk."

"Yeah we do." I motioned for him to sit down.

"You go first."

"I want a divorce." He said.

"Huh?"

"We both aren't happy in this marriage even our daughter is starting to notice it.

"Who said we weren't happy?"

"Bey, you and I both know you aren't happy with me."

"I am happy with you Shawn." I cried." I was willing to work things out with you knowing that you were out here being unfaithful."

"How could you be with someone that constantly hurts you?"

"Because even though you hurt me you do little things that keep me around. Call me ignorant for wanting to stay but I love you. I can't imagine life without you and I don't want to. I don't know what I did for you to cheat on me. But I'm here staying trying to work it out while you're going to throw it all away. Like I don't mean anything to you."

"That's because I can't do this anymore, Beyonce. I love you but I'm not in love with you. A man that loves you shouldn't cheat on you. He should lift you up and you should be his entire world. He should worship the ground you walk on and treat you like the queen you are. I want to be an example to my daughter of how a man should treat her. What I'm doing to you isn't right and I don't want to keep hurting you Bey."

"So this is it?"

"Yes have your stuff out my house by next week." And with that he got up and left.

I couldn't do nothing but cry I wanted to be with him but he didn't want me. I'm Beyoncé everyone wants me and for him to shut me down hurts.

****

It's been a few days since the talk I had with Shawn and three months since I've talked to Nicki. I have been avoiding them. I filed for divorce so now it's a waiting game for him to sign the papers. They can't serve him because he's moving around to much and they can never catch him.