Deep breath in. Deep breath out. Deep breath in. Deep breath out.
Perry continued to remind herself to breath as the results were read to her. The doctor sat across the table, with his glasses sitting low on the bridge of his nose. He stared carefully at the piece of paper in front of him before he began speaking.
Perry ran her hands up and down her legs, trying to get some sort of sensation. She needed to feel something. Lately everything had been dreary and dark. She didn't feel sad, she felt nothing. But she wanted to feel everything.
"Ms. Jasper Conway," the lanky doctor began. Perry quickly looked up from her legs and peered into the doctor's sad eyes. "You failed your depression test. The way you describe you have been feeling lately is the exact signs of someone with depression,"
Perry wasn't surprised. She had known that something was wrong. Or maybe everything was wrong. "What can I do to get better?" she asked wearily. Her voice barely came out and she was shocked, not expecting to be speechless from the news that she was expecting.
"We are going to subscribe you some medicine and we recommend you see a therapist and we can get you set up with one while you are here today. But from the questions that you answered for us, it seems you have lost interest in everything. My suggestion for you," he leans forward now to get closer to Perry, emphasizing the importance of his next words. "is to find something that will make you want to wake up in the morning, want to get out of bed, want to experience life."
Perry nodded slowly. It had been so long since she had felt like that. She didn't know when she fell into this hole, but the longer she was there the deeper it got.
The tall doctor made it sound so simple to find something that made life worth living. He must never have suffered from depression. Didn't he know she had been trying to do that on her own? She had tried to pick up so many hobbies over the last year, but none of them sent that tingle of life in her that she had been searching for.
Deep breath in. Deep breath out. Deep breath in. Deep breath out. Just breathe Perry. She continued to remind herself.
Little did she know that she would find that thing in her life that would not only give her a tingle, but a rush of feeling.
