Well it seems you’ve picked up a copy of my guidebook. Guidebooks are good for everything in this world. With a guide, you can tell the difference between the call of a Western Lark and an American Goldfinch. You can identify soapstone and diamond and shale. With the proper information, you can decipher animal prints, learn how to use advanced weapons, play a new musical instrument, mathematics, English, history, science, basketball, baseball, advanced physics, plants, maps, prices, even the next full moon. I think you get the point. A guide is completely essential for life to exist the way it does now.
I know what you might be thinking. ‘Zombies? Armageddon? The end of the world? Balderdash!’ Well, I agree. What proof is there that such a thing will happen? Such a horror of science that many dare not think of as reality. Sure we play the apocalypse in books, shoot our way through video games, and cling to our seats in movie theatres. But none of this could happen, right?
It is possible, but the probability of such an event is debatable. For this to occur, war would have to spiral out of control. It’s possible that the zombie outbreak could be a result of biochemical warfare gone wrong. A disease meant to strike down an enemy soon turned against the entire world. Maybe it’s an evolutionary phenomenon. Maybe it’s intentional, sent out to the population by criminals.
Honestly, if you’re in a situation where you’re shooting your best friend in the head to save your own life, how it happened doesn’t matter. And that’s why I’m here. This is my complete guide to saving your skin, and the few skins of those close to you, during the possible zombie outbreak.
In the following pages I will take you step by step through proper procedures and tactics. I will divulge information gathered through years of personal research and development. Here I discuss the best ways to make it to a rescue base, or the best way to stick it out on your own.
I know there are lots of guides for zombie apocalypses available on the market. But this one is an in-depth and clear outline of the dos and don’ts of surviving. Just because the zombie outbreak isn’t guaranteed, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t prepare, right? I mean, just because you read a book on how to read sheet music doesn’t mean you’ll ever pick up an instrument. But this should satisfy the what-ifs in life.
Enough rambling.
Read on.
