Frozen Solid // Alan Ashby

Chapter Fifteen

In the last few days I've learnt a lot about being best friends with benefits. It has various rules that you just sort of learn as you go. For instance:

1. you never discuss your 'benefits' with anyone.

2. If people mention a relationship between you and your best friend, you deny at all costs.

3. Don't act 'beneficial' when people you know are around.

Since the day in the restaurant our 'benefits' have been nothing but kissing, not that I'm complaining.

"Wait, so she's dead?" I asked for the billionth time.

Alan groaned. "Yes! She overdosed in the bathtub!"

"But why is she still, like, alive...." I asked dumbly, this television show was really confusing.

"Becauuuussseee." he dragged out as he hit his forehead on my shoulder. "That's just how dead people are on this show."

"Is that how dead people are in real life?" I quizzed.

"Yep. I've been dead for years." Alan shrugged. I gave him a shocked look. "December! I'm being sarcastic!!"

"I don't understand sarcasm! Why would you say something and mean the opposite?!" I complained. He just laughed at me.

I gave up on the television and grabbed my notebook off of the table next to me. I pulled the pen out of the bindings and flipped it open to the last thing I wrote.

"Can I read that?" Alan peeked over my shoulder. I shrugged and handed him the journal.

I watched his eyes scan over the page, his forehead scrunched in a way that made him look like he was concentrating really hard. I wasn't even entirely sure what the poem was about.

"Jesus. Are you bad at anything?" he asked with wide eyes.

I shrugged. "I'm not very good at understanding half the things people say."

He rolled his eyes. "Can I read more?" he asked with a hopeful smile.

"Go ahead." I giggled. He opened to a random page and started reading again.

-

"I guess what I'm trying to say, is I need the deep end. Keep imagining meeting, wished away entire lifetimes. Unfair we're not somewhere misbehaving for days." I sang softly. Alan dragged his fingers through my dark hair. We have two days off in Texas so management booked us all hotel rooms.

Me and Alan get to share a room. Phil and Anouk get to share a room (they got a couples suite and everything). Austin and Mena (who've been dating for a few days now. She's the merch girl) get to share a room. And then Tino and Aaron get to share a room.

Mine and Alan's room had two queen sized beds, but Alan pushed the beds together. So now, despite the strict no smoking policy, me and Alan are sprawled out on the mega bed and smoking loads of cigarettes.

"You're perfect." I heard Alan whisper. I was thankful he couldn't see my face because I was blushing to no extent.

But I guess he knew I was blushing because he laughed quietly. Mine and Alan's 'relationship' has grown quite, unique.

Alan described it as 'painfully tumblr'. I have no clue what that means, but I think it's good. When we're alone we always try to find a quite place and spend hours just smoking and kissing.

Sometimes we won't even talk. And this may sound weird, but when Alan doesn't say anything, I hear more about him. In a way, his silence speaks louder than his words. I can read his body language with ease. I wonder if he can do the same towards me.