"Tell me again why are we going to Mendiola."
"Becaaause buddy, you need to see this."
"We could've just drove there. Your car was just outside your dorm. Nagpahatid na lang sana tayo kay Ate Mich papuntang UP."
"Naaaaaah. Tinatamad ako. Plus, I'm sleepy. That won't do us both any good if I fell asleep on the wheel, don't you think? "
"I can drive, Caloy."
"As far as I can remember your license is still suspended from the last time na you and Ate Bea went cruising to Pangasinan. Wait, cruising isn't the word. I meant, you and Ate Bea went racing to Pangasinan." Oh god. Not that again.
"My sister forced me. We we're trying to get there before seven in the morning so we could head home by later afternoon. How could we get there on our scheduled time frame if I was driving at 30 km per hour? Tsaka it seemed like a good idea then. It was so early in the morning." I explained. Whether or not it was a successful elaboration. I have yet to see.
"At since tanga ka ring gago ka, you thought there would be no popos driving around?" Of course, hindi. Dito pa ba sa berdugong 'to.
"Will you lower your voice. Nakakahiya. 'Di mo 'to sasakyan." I can see why Tita Ella is so fond of her. Damn, the two are like two sides of the same coin. "Umm, sorry about that Kuya ah. My friend here is kinda complicated."
"Gago, you say complicated as if it's a bad thing. I'd rather be complex than be predictable."
Our Uber driver just chuckled and continued driving. Well, atleast he isn't judging me by my lapse in judgment. Or is he?
Wait, just remembered that Caloy and I don't share the same vacant time.
"Don't you have classes?"
"I do but this is a matter of life and death for you so I decided to take this day off. It's a good thing too. I have history as my next subject. And I ain't really a fan. " she said as she close her eyes. Matutulog na 'to, jusko.
"I AM a history major and for me? What the fuck are you talking about?"
"I'll tell you when we get there. So could you just ya know ease up a bit? Go listen to LANY or Hozier or whatever stuff you're into right now."
"Post Malone, actually."
"Great. Whatever. Now, shut the fuck up and let me sleep. It's been a long time na makaranas na naman ako ng atleast limang oras ng tulog. Even though, it's not continuous."
I wish I could have my best friend's ability to just lay on any surface and fall asleep almost immediately. But with the way she's positioned now, rest assured that back pain would be imminent. Although, Caloy is the least of my worries. I saw how Fel's face looked kanina and how Ate Bea looked grim before sending us good bye. She's worried. We all are. Fel's been doing great before today. And between the two of us, she's the one whose got her shit together. Well, not exactly. I remembered how my Mom installed all seven locks on our main door. How my older sisters took turns sleeping beside Fel. And how my Mommy cried when we found her unconscious after a day spend strolling the mall. While I... I couldn't do anything. And it still frustrates me how useless I was when my twin broke apart. Tita Ella just patted my head and told me that I should just make her laugh at all cost, and I did. I tried. However, there was a whole week that Fel would just stare. That she can't even be fed. She was only getting her nutrients from the IV that's sticking out on her arm. It was torture. After a few months she's back to being the hyperactive bunny she is. Getting all protective and cuddly with us especially me. I overheard my mothers talking about how high her dosage is and Mommy was worried that that might fry her liver and kidneys but if we requested for the dosage to be lowered Fel might just go to relapse, my Mom explained. They were backed up against the wall. I didn't know what my twin had back then. No one told me. Until, I found the feedback or review, whatever they called it on my parent's bed. I was supposed to borrow a pair of Kobe's from them when I saw that stupid brown envelope.
Felicia Marie L. Valdez
Psychiatric Department
Psychiatry and Behavorial Services
St. Luke's Medical Center
So yeah. It wasn't pretty. None of it was pretty. That's why I don't fucking get why people throw around mental disorders at random. There are some instances that they put bipolar on their bios. Do you even know what my sister had to go through whenever she's manic? Or worse when she's back to that pit of hell of depression? Don't confuse mood swings with an actual illness recognized by the World Health Organization.
"Hey, kid. You okay, bud?" our Uber driver glanced at me with the mirror, I wasn't aware that I was already sobbing. It's just painful.
"Yeah. Got something on my eye. Need to wash it down with tears. Hahahaha!"
"All right, bud. I ain't gonna pry. But you need to wake your little friend there. Malapit na tayo. Himala at walang traffic." he gave me a reassuring smile and looked back on the road. Need to wipe my eyes. Baka asarin na naman ako nitong demonyong 'to. Masapak ko pa siya.
"Caloy, wake up." I started to shake her head to remove her from whatever or wherever dream she's in.
"Putang ina naman, pare. Feeling ko naging bopis na utak ko kakayugyog mo."
"Fuck you. Malapit na raw kasi tayo and you're still sleeping. Good god, Tots."
"Shut up, Deans. Kuya hehehehe pwede po pahatid kaming peace arch? And you, my brotha from anotha motha. Get ready to be giddyyyy.
I looked at her. Fel's right. 'Di ka na nagbago, Caloy. Siraulo ka pa rin.
