Pursuing Mr. Bieber || zustin au ✔

[34] Forever & Always

"We need to talk."

Justin and Zayn sat on Justin's couch, Zayn sitting on Justin's lap and Justin's arms wrapped around Zayn's waist. After Harry had left, they decided to move to the couch where more tears were shared, along with hugging, kissing, and cuddling. It's been about an hour of making up for lost time. Now, they two had sat in silence; both lost in thoughts, Justin deeper than Zayn. He knew that he had to talk to Zayn about what happened the night before he caught Justin and Alex in bed with each other, and that made Justin's stomach churn. As bad as he didn't want to bring it up, he knew it was affecting both him and Zayn. If they didn't talk about it, he knew that their relationship wouldn't be the same.

Zayn nodded his head in agreement, knowing they needed to as well. That's been on his mind every since Harry left. Though he knew he had nothing to be scared about, that didn't stop his heart from beating wildly in his chest. What Justin said really hurt him, and if he was honest, it made him cower away and have a setback. Zayn knew he was slowly slipping back to where he used to be in his past, and as bad as he wanted to stop that, he couldn't. He just hoped that he'd be able to be brought out of his shell again and be able to talk to people without them getting annoyed or irritated by him.

But Zayn knew that he said some offensive things as well.

Zayn slid off Justin's lap, and as bad as Justin wanted to pull him into his arms, he knew that it was better if he wasn't. When Zayn settles beside him, Justin sighed, turning and meeting Zayn's worried and nervous eyes. He didn't understand why Zayn was nervous though. If anybody should be nervous, it was Justin, and he was.

Letting out a sigh, Justin began to talk; something he should've done from the beginning. "I'm sorry for ignoring you for those days. I should've at least let you know that I was fine. I know you, Zayn, and I bet you were worried as hell," Justin let out a small chuckle, and Zayn nodded his head. Justin smiled nervously as his eyes began to water. "A-and I'm sorry for using your past against you. I know how fragile you are about it, but my stupid ass still did it anyway. That was the worst mistake I've probably ever made." Justin took a deep breath, staring into Zayn eyes as a tear slid out of it. Justin regretted what he said miserably at it was just settling in what damage he might've done. "Please forgive me, Zayn. I guess I don't know how to grieve properly, and when you came to check on me... I just took out everything that I was feeling on you, and for that, I will always regret." And he would. Justin couldn't even forgive himself for what he said to Zayn. He knew how boyfriend is about his past, and to know that he was the one who used it against him made him feel completely like shit.

Zayn heart soared from Justin's confession and apology, but to be truthful, he was still hurt. He knew his boyfriend was grieving at the time, but Zayn was just trying to be a good boyfriend. But, he knew he wouldn't hang on that hurt forever. He already forgave Justin, and by what Justin said, Zayn knew he was going to try to help Justin forgive himself, and that he was willing to do.

Zayn reached over and grabbed Justin, hand and squeezed it. Justin looked at him with his tear filled eyes. "I forgive you, Justin," Zayn spoke softly, sending Justin a reassuring smile. Justin's eyes widened in shock, obviously not expecting Zayn to say that. "And I'm sorry for being a bother. I knew you were grieving and I should've given you the space that you wanted as you told me to. I'm sorry for what I said the last time we saw each other too," he mumbles.

Justin sent Zayn a glare, cupping the man's cheek when he held his head down. Zayn instantly looked back up, meeting Justin's serious gaze. "No," he says. "You have nothing to be sorry for. You were being a good boyfriend and checking up on me. I know if you were going through the same thing, I would've been wanting to know how you were doing too. Please don't blame yourself for this situation." Please don't have a setback, he wanted to say, but he knew it was too late.