Hiding ~ Phan

Part 1

*** ayy this is my first fic, it's Phan, so enjoy i guess ***

~Phil's POV~

"Faggot!" "Pussy!" "Loser!" "Freak!" 

The words came tumbling out of my mouth, hitting the trembling boy in front of me almost as hard as the kicks I was delivering to his stomach. I don't know why I'm doing this. The boy has never done anything to me. My other friends surrounded me, cheering me on. I suppose that was what kept me doing it. I needed to stay on the good side of Chris and PJ, or they'd treat me like I was treating this kid. Pathetic. I didn't even know his name. 

~Dan's POV~

I could feel the blows to my stomach, but they didn't hurt nearly as much as the words that Phil was speaking. Phil. My crush. I would never have thought this would be how we'd meet. Me, lying on the floor, halfway to unconscious, and him, beating me up, calling me names. I could manage to drown out everyone else, so it was just me and him, but that didn't help. I didn't care about what everyone else was saying. Phil was all that mattered and he was kicking the shit out of me. Does he even know my name?

~Phil's POV~

"Stay down." I hiss into the kid's ear then proceed to spit on him. I high-five Chris as we walk away, laughing, but I can't help looking back at the boy, genuinely worried for his health. Will he be able to get home? I try not to let this worry me. I know all too much about caring for people. They'll eventually just beat you down and strip away your pride. I'm completely lost in my own thoughts, until I'm snapped back to reality by PJ saying "That fag has a huge crush on you, Phil." "What?" I ask, startled by the sudden remark. "Yeah," Chris sneers "We got into his sketchbook and he draws so many pictures of you! What a loser". I consider this for a moment. The guy was really cute, so it didn't make any sense that he'd be drawing me of all people. "Well, I'm not gay, so he can back off" I say quite harshly. I always got defensive when it came to protecting my secret. "Calm down, mate." Chris says, looking at me with a questioning expression. "Y'know what was weird about those sketches?" PJ says thoughtfully, "You always had cat whiskers. He wasn't drawing you as a cat, but it looked liked you had drawn them on your face in sharpie or something." "Weird" I mutter, and look down at the pavement, blushing. What could this cute guy want to do with me?

~Dan's POV~

I could hear them discussing my sketches as they walked away, and I groan. Brilliant. Now Phil will know about my crush on him, and he'll hate me more. Why do I mess up at every school I go to? I'll never fit in. I'm like the puzzle piece that belongs in another box. I won't fit in anywhere. No matter how hard you try to squeeze and push, I won't stay. Even if I manage to find some space, I'll end up broken. I'm way beyond repair. I try to sit up, but a sharp stab of pain shoots through my body. I look at myself and try to assess the damage. A lot of big, black and blue bruises along my arms, possibly a broken bone in my leg, an ugly black eye and a large cut starting at my eyebrow then leading down to my mouth. Nothing more than usual. I'll need to stay sitting for around 40 minutes before I can start moving. It was about 5pm and my parents wouldn't be home for another 2 hours, but eventually I'd have to face them and round 2 of today's beatings. Ever since they found out I was gay they didn't seem to be able to stop hitting me, even if it was for the smallest things. About 10 minutes past, and I heard footsteps walking towards me. Great, they've come back for more. I look up, expecting to see a baseball bat swing towards my head, but instead I see the face of an angel. Phil's face.

~Phil's POV~

I felt like shit when I was walking home. I couldn't get the cute boy out of my mind. Why had I beaten him up? I didn't know. Chris and PJ told me to, and right now, fitting in at this school was all that mattered. Suddenly, a huge wave of regret and pity washed over me, and I knew I couldn't just let him sit there in the street, injured and alone. I turned around, going back to him. Luckily Chris and PJ had already gotten home, so they wouldn't see where I was going. After around 15 minutes I could see him. God, he looked awful. His arms were practically covered in bruises and his face was scarlet from the amount of blood coming from a large gash. I picked up my pace, eager to help him. As I approached him, he looked up, terrified. He flinched away from me and I felt like a complete idot. Obviously this kid would be scared of me. I'd beaten him senseless less than half and hour ago. How did I think he'd feel about me? I stand there, looking at him. Waiting for him to realize I wasn't here to fight. "Please.. just get it over and done with.. I don't want any more trouble" I could hear him mumbling. "Look," I sigh, "I'm not here to hurt you. I'm really, really sorry about what I did. I don't even know why I did it. I'm a compete dick head, I know, but I'm trying to fit in. I own't hurt you again. I know what it feels like to be in your position. I'm sorry. I want to help you." I put out my hand, hoping he'd take it. He looks at it doubtfully and doesn't take it. I sigh again. "I'm sorry, I don't even know your name. I'm Phil. Who're you?"

~Dan's POV~

"I'm sorry, I don't even know your name. I'm Phil-" Of course I know how you are, dummy. I've been drawing you in my sketch book for the past week "- Who're you?" I look at him skeptically. He's asking my name? I guess there's no harm in telling him. "I'm Dan" I say in a small voice "Dan Howell." He smiles at me, grateful I've communicated with him. "Hi Dan. Now, I know you really hate me right now, but it looks like you need some medical attention. Can you please let me help you back to your house?" He says, thrusting his hand towards me. Why would he want to help me? Only 20 minutes ago he was beating the shit out of me. I look around, trying to spot Chris and PJ, sure they were pranking me. "Dan, I'm the only one here" Phil says. "Promise?" I ask. "Promise." Slowly, I put out my hand, letting him help me up. I try to ignore the feeling that someone was stabbing my in the side, but it was obvious how  much pain I was in. "Jeez, we need to get you home." I nod my head, letting him take my arm and put it around his neck for support. Slowly, we limp down the path, towards the housing estates. I look at him, look at his piercing blue eyes, coal black hair and ivory skin. Suddenly, I realize we'd walked straight past my house. "Um, Phil, my house is back there" I tell him, pointing behind us. "Oh" He says, blinking. We turn around and head back the other way. After directing him, we eventually end up at my front door. No one was home. That was good, I unlock the door with my key, and let Phil in. I close the door, and try to walk down the corridor, only to fall over after my leg weakens. "Woah there, let me carry you" Phil says, and soon I'm scooped up into his arms. I look up at him, grateful, yet embarrassed. "Take me to the living room, and put me on the sofa. I'll be fine there. It's that door there" I say, pointing to the living room. Phil walks into the living room, then sets me down  onto the sofa. 

~Phil's POV~ 

I stared at Dan's beautiful face, amazed at how he'd trusted me even though I had caused him so much physical pain. I admired him for that. I usually pushed people away because I was afraid they'd hurt me, or even worse, I'd hurt them. "Dan, once again, I'm really really sorry about what I did. I promise you I'll never do it again. I don't know what was going on though my head. I know what it's like to be in your position. I used to get bullied at my other schools, but not as badly as this. I feel like such a douche bag. I'm sorry. Stupid, stupid, stupid..." I say, pressing my face into my hands. "Phil, it's okay" Dan says, reaching over and squeezing my thigh. I look at him again, captured by his chocolate brown eyes. "I have to ask you something" I say quietly. Dan's eyes look up innocently at me. "Why did you have a bunch of sketches of my in your book?" I ask. The colour drains from his cheeks and eyes. "Well, uh, Phil.. There's um.. something I-I need to tell you." He says, blushing. I nod, indicating that he should continue. "Well, you see... the thing is... I-I really... Like... have this huge c-crush on y-you.." He immediately looks away and apologizes "I'm sorry, I really am. I'm just a fag. You should leave. I'm sorry. You hate me now-" I shut him up with a kiss. He whimpers, startled, then relaxes into me, out bodies melting together. I put him fingers on his head, clutching his hair, the other on his back. He leans into me, gripping my hips. We were so immersed in the kiss that we didn't hear the front door open, didn't realize Dan's parents were home early, and didn't see them at the living room door, staring at us.