They don't know.
So they go with the flow.
They don't need to know.
They're happy not knowing at all.
So I won't say a thing about what's wrong.
I looked at myself in the mirror, and I looked blank.
Like I was just another body, with just another face.
I felt so unreal.
I went to the kitchen, grabbed some water..and took my pills.
I've never been so hungry, that I refuse to eat.
Never been so sleepy, that I can't sleep.
Till now, but no one's around.
The king of outcasted teens, hah, they should crown me.
I feel the Earth's battle to stay in the sky.
I feel the dirt of an old battlefield where good people have died.
I feel the pain of gunshot wound from back in 1955.
I feel the courage of a man on a bridge, who dived.
I feel it all, deep in my mind.
And I wish, I fucking wish I knew why.
The smell of cigarettes stick to my clothes.
The tears start falling, and I blow my nose.
In the world, it doesn't matter if you're friends or foes.
You just die, and that's all.
From natural death, or the creepy image of the movie, "Saw".
Heart attack, stroke, tumor, cancer, and suicide.
All these deaths seem to collide.
After all this pain of life, what's there to find?
I know in this life I was given, I was no where near perfect.
But I plan to make up for it, with all due respect.
I hope I'm given a second chance, and come back as a common stray cat.
Because I guess that's how I was for a while, but I want to be able to have no words.
No way to get myself twist or turned.
So I don't have to explain myself.
All I do is fight back with a yell, and my nails.
Living is to learn and to perfect your soul, until you reach an enlightened existence.
And I want to keep trying, but no one understands it and sees the brilliance.
I've been hurt, and broken. I've even hurt myself.
But that book is over, time to place it on the shelf.
I need a new start.
New materials for a new beginning, fresh items in the cart.
This time I'll come back better, and more smart.
So, if I leave my body today,
and come back as a stray.
Don't be sad at all,
you never knew me anyway.
