self-confidence . || usuk

Two/

"Have you ever been to a Seven Eleven, Arthur?," Alfred asked him. They were in Alfred's little red corvette that his daddy probably bought for him. Arthur shook his head. "Whaaaat? Duude, you're missing out big time."

"Well," Arthur fidgeted in his seat. "I don't go out all that much."

"I can tell. You're paler than snow on a Christmas morning."

"Haha.," Arthur said sarcastically. His stomach twisted. One more thing to hate. "You're so funny, Jones."

"Ouch.," Alfred placed a hand to his heart, smiling widely. "Last name. That hurts."

They pulled up to a convenience store with a gas station out front and many large signs that read "7/11". Alfred hopped out of the car. "Wait right here.," he said.

"Oh, trust me.," Arthur looked around. "I'm not going anywhere."

About 10 minutes later, Alfred came back with two very large plastic cups in hand. He gave one to Arthur. Arthur looked into the cup. Inside looked like blood poured over crushed ice and smelt vaguely like artificial cherries.

"Are you sure about this?," he asked nervously. "I'm not very sure about this."

"Its fine.," Alfred assured him. "I been here plenty of times. Nothing is ever wrong. Except the hot dogs... they're always too cold."

"Why are we talking about hot dogs now? I can't do this, this is too much pressure."

"Whoa, whoa, no, dude, chill. It's all cool, dude."

Arthur took a deep breath, staring at the cup he had in his hand again. He wasn't too sure what to do. He didn't trust Alfred all that much, because, well, he had just met him. But... he did say that Arthur was his friend. He never had a friend before. He took another breath. It's worth a shot.

With Alfred watching carefully, he took a hit. Maybe a bit to much, because afterwards, there was a large pain that went all throughout his body, and it hurt like hell. "FUCK.," He hit the armrest next to him as he yelled. "BLOODY HELL DAMN IT ALL TO HELL AND THE BLOODY. FUCKING. QUEEN." Alfred did nothing but laugh, which made Arthur feel even more hurt. "What the hell are you laughing at!"

"Dude, you are such an alien. You haven't even expirenced a brain freeze.," Alfred tried to catch his breath. ( freeze ur braiiiinnnn ) "That's classic. I should tell the BTT about this, oh my God, they're going to love you."

Arthur was going to protest, but Alfred already threw the car in reverse. "So, Mr. Kirkland.," He said, turning the wheel but not paying any attention to the road. "I assume that you're going to tell me your woeful backstory by now. And when you're done, I'll tell you mine. That was the deal, remember?"

"Yes, I clearly remember. I don't remember why I agreed to this, however.," Arthur paused, gathering a basic timeline in his mind for what he was about to say, then took a few deep breaths. "My father left when I was young. I don't remember many details or memories with him, because it was too early in my lifetime, so it was just me, my mum, and my brothers. I never got along with anyone in my family, really. When my father left, they blamed me, telling me that I was the reason that he didn't want to be around us anymore. When my mother died, they blamed me for it, as well, telling me I made her too weak to go on. There was something they just hated about me, which later developed into my own self hatred. I don't see myself as any good to this world..." ( yikes the longest paragraph in this fic is this )

"... Did'ja... make any, uh... y'know...," Alfred stumbled on his words, like he was afriad to say something. "Shit, how do you put this lightly... didyoumakeanyattempts?"

"That's personal."

"Did you get any help?"

"No."

"Oh, c'mon.," Alfred stopped at a red light, then Arthur realized that he wasn't mad at the fantastically poor traffic, but at him personally. "Not even once? That's gonna fuck you up in the long run, and the attempts become successes. Have you thought about that? Bet not. Bet you think nothings ever going to happen because nobody cares. That's just..."

He stopped mid-sentence, and looked back at the road. This was an abnormally long red light. Arthur spoke up. "Are you okay?" ( i was alone,,, i was a frooozen laake,,,, )  ( i forgot how many heathers references i made in this fic when i was typing this at first )

"My parents adopted me when I was 5. They already had a son, and as soon as I met him, I already called him my brother. Me and him were close. Been through thick and thin. Then we hit middle school and something about him just changed, y'know?" Alfred ran a hand through his hair. His eyes were clouded with trouble. "He became like, a ghost. One day, I think during sophomore year, or something like that, he disappeared. Week later, dead. I wouldn't of known, because he didn't tell anybody."

Arthur was filled with guilt. He led him into this conversation, because he was such an idiot. "I'm sorry that happened. I didn't mean for this to end up like... this. I'm really sorry, I should go home, I... I'm just messing things up."

"No, it's fine...," Alfred straightened up in his seat. "It felt good to say that, 'cause I hadn't told anyone that story in two years. Only people who know now are you, and the BTT," he flashed his winning smile, "Who you will soon meet.," When the light turned green, he floored the corvette, and it went as fast as it could go in a suburban area. "But what I haven't told you is what the outcome was. I wouldn't let myself go unnoticed, so when football season started, I joined, and then baseball, 'cause I will only play America's greatest games. You should come to a football game sometime, I'm a great player."

Arthur scoffed, covering a small smile. This guy was outrageous. "Sure, you are, Jones."

"Artieeeeee, call me Afreddddd. Don't stick to that last name bullshit, you're killing the mood."

"What mood? And don't call me that."

"You're not feeling the mood, Artie? 'Cause I'm sure feeling the mood, Artie." Alfred was only teasing. Harmless, playful teasing. ( gay ) There was nothing for Arthur to worry about. It was fine. They were fine.

Soon, they pulled up to a house, which looked more like a McMansion. Alfred pulled up in the drive way, which was moderately empty. Arthur sat in awe. "This can't be your house."

"It isn't. It's Francis's, lucky ol' bastard. I live in a normal two story house with my parents."

"Must be nice."

"Okay, no more moping, you're meeting the BTT."

*

"whoa aj two updates in one day do that more often pls"

no i suck ass

sorry ilya