Foster Care//Phan [Complete]

Chapter 7

Dan's POV

"Dan! Phil! Adrian! We're going out tonight!" I heard Phil's mum call out from downstairs. Phil was in his room doing god knows what and I was pretty sure Adrian was in his room, playing the Playstation. I was simply laying on my bed. I had nothing better to do. So I just laid here, thinking. Which is probably the worst for me buuut who gives a shit. Soon enough my thoughts were consuming me and pushing me into a deep dark existential crisis.

'what even is the point of life...? You have no parents. It's all your fault. Now Adrian has no parents to love and care for him because of you! You don't deserve shit... You're a failure. Pathetic. And your stupid boy crush will never like you. You don't deserve to be liked by anyone. This family shouldn't have ever taken you in. You're worthless.'

All I could hear was my brain screaming at me. I am worthless. Eventually, I laid there, crying my eyes out again. I crawled out of my bed and slowly moved downstairs to the kitchen. Soon I was looking through the cabinets for something to eat. Then I opened a very particular cabinet. It had different kinds of alcohol in it. My mind hadn't stopped screaming at me and I haven't stopped crying. "P-People say this numbs the feelings..." I mumble out as I reach up and grab a large bottle. Soon enough I started chugging it down.

Soon I felt well numb. It felt good. I kept chugging it down, stumbling up the stairs. I was sure that my eyes were bloodshot from all my crying. I wanted arms around me. I stumbled up to Phil's room, seeing his door was open. I smirked happily, seeing him on his bed, chewing on his lip as he played his DS. He looked so hot. I bit my lip, taking one last drink from the bottle, putting it on the ground before bursting into his room, singing 'I write sins not tragedies by Panic! At The Disco'

"I chime in with a "Haven't you people ever heard of closing a goddamn door?"; no, it's much better to face these kinds of things; with a sense of poise and rationality~!!" Phil jumped and stared at me as I slurred my words, stumbling over to his bed. "D-Dan? Are you... Are you drunk!?" I laughed happily and smirked, I don't know, are you~?" Phil shook his head, his eyes filled with concern. I smirked happily and sat on his bed beside him "What cha doing~?" Phil sighed and closed his DS "About to try to keep you from doing anything stupid... Dan why are you drunk! You do realize you are under age" I smirked happily and giggled "Awh Philly loosen up~!" Phil sighed and shook his head, going to stand up "Come on let's get you to bed Dan" I grabbed his wrist and pulled him back, scooting closer "You're cute Phiwy~" Phil blushed brightly "W-what?" I smirked more and leant closer to his face "I said you're cute~" Phil blushed and watched me. I giggled and crashed my lips to his. My mind could care less that I was kissing him. Soon I felt him kiss back, it was shy but he was still kissing me. I giggled against his lips, kissing him harder. Phil kissed me more, cupping my cheeks. I smirked happily and moved to where I was sitting in his lap, pressing my ass down on his crotch. I heard him groan softly, kissing harder. I whined out softly, gripping his sides. Phil kissed down my neck, causing me to moan out. My neck being the most sensitive spot I have. "Oh~" Phil pulled away quickly "D-Dan... I can't do this... You're drunk! I can't do something you might regret... come on.. let's go get you in your bed"

I pouted but apparently, I didn't have a say because soon I was being picked up and carried to my bed. Soon he laid me down, kissing my forehead "Get some rest Dan" I looked up at him and nodded, watching him walk out. I frowned, tearing up. I wasn't sure why but I started crying. 'He'll never like you. even if he did fucking kiss you. You're a lonely piece of shit.' Soon I stood up, grabbing my bag and digging through it, getting a small pencil case, getting a blade. I threw my pants off, seeing my thighs were full of cuts. I cried harder and looked at my clean wrists. I held the blade to my wrist and drug the blade across my skin. I did it again. And again. And again... Soon my wrist was covered in cuts. I threw the blade, laying down and crying heavily until I fell asleep.