Suicide, my sweetheart.

entry Three

It's been a month since Cedar's miscarriage. shes gotten more and more depressed. she feels worthless because she's not able to produce us offspring. I keep reassuring her...but her depression is wearing off on me. i can't stand seeing her like this, i can understand why she's like this.

She walked up to me. "Oliver...i can't take it anymore. I'm tired of feeling so awful, so...empty." she cried, i understood how she felt. i knew the pain, i, myself, couldn't take it anymore, couldn't take the sad look in her eyes all the tims. "what do you reckon we do?" i said to her, holding her. she looked at me, her eyes spilling tears over. "suicide...my sweetheart" she mumbled, her face going lax and somewhat dead. of course, i didnt think she was serious.
The next morning, i woke to find she wasnt in bed. i went into the living room, she wasnt there either, or the kitchen. i searched for a bit until i went back into the bedroom and noticed an open window. i looked out of it and down....there she was. her body mangled and a pool of blood surrounding her. i slumped down, crying hard. she was gone...it was too late...my darling, my one and only love, the one i held every night, the most interesting girl i knew. the one i was supposed to spend eternity with, gone forever, all the memories we shared, gone...
I took her to the hospital, still. They confirmed she was dead, the funeral would be next month. They also told me something else...

She was expecting a baby...