Closure

Ch.5

     A week later I walked back into Ms. Peony's office. I felt really bad about last time when I just abruptly left. I tend to do a lot of things I regret, but we're all human and we make mistakes all the time. It's just apart of growing up and knowing the world around you and the people who live on this planet I suppose. 

     "Hello again, Amber. Lets hope I don't upset you this time." Ms. Peony said with an ashamed glow on her face.

     "No worries Ms. Peony, its quite alright." I said with a fake sense of positivity.

     "Alright, well then lets get started. Shall we?" Ms. Peony began, "So. Tell me. How was it that the two of you got to know each other? What did you find out about him that was appealing or unappealing to you?"

     "Well. I'm usually a straight forward person and I like to just get to the point of things. I was surprised when he just straight up asked who I was as a person, basically asking whats my story. I told him honestly how and who I am, which by the way you wont disagree with because you know me as a person; Ms. Peony. But I told him that I care too much about other people when it comes to anything. I told him that I put others before myself, that I would risk my life for someone else. He asked why I would do that for someone or even anyone for that matter and I said its because I don't know the life of that person. I don't know what they have been going through, good nor bad. I don't exactly know what sparked my thoughts and ways of being considerate of other people and their lives but, I feel like its the right thing to do. After I said my piece I asked him what his story was as well and what he told me was almost a mirror image of what I said. However he said that he wasn't that daring to put his own life on the line for a stranger. But one thing that hit hard for me was the fact that he would help cancer patients. He said he would grow out his hair, long, and then he would cut it all off to donate. He also told me how he would go and spend time with patients, like the volunteer system that they would do at the hospital. I asked him what made him want to do that and help patients and he told me that one of his old friends that he played football with had cancer and died from its severity. Of course I had felt bad about his friend because no one should have to go through the passing of their friend. But the fact that he was able to take time out of his day and do something beautiful in spite of his friends passing shows me how strong of a person he truly is." I said with a serious expression. 

     "He sounds like a very inspiring person, just like yourself Amber. This is all helping me understand what you're going through and how this connection was so deep. I've never really heard of a relationship like this before and I do agree with you how it is a shame that it ended." Ms. Peony said with a mellow expression, "Now, were the feelings between the two of you mutual as they seemed or..? I would like to know how he loved you or admired you from your perspective." 

     "I know it was mutual. He was as crazy about me as I was of him. We both had a very similar personality because we were both very laid back and a lot of the little things we liked were the same as well. Like rainy days. Every day it rains I think of him. We both loved rainy days and believed the perfect date would be on a rainy day. We both romanticized it so much. He was so passionate, just like how I can get. You know, during that relationship he brought out the best in me. He made me realize who I really was because I wasn't so afraid to be myself. I would openly laugh at the things I wanted to. I would openly cry about issues that bothered me. I would tell him my thoughts and he would give me a serious answer and he wouldn't doubt me. He would never doubt me for a second. He never thought I was absurd or that I was a psycho or anything. It was just perfect that I found someone who would listen. Now looking at it I feel like I was selfish. I feel like I didn't listen to him as much as I should have. I know he would tell me how he felt and stuff but I feel like I didn't really ask too much. I dunno. Him and I were so straight forward that there probably was no need to ask because we already knew.  I'm just really confused as to why it abruptly ended. I knew he was in the process of moving out here still which is why I thought he wasn't messaging so much but I didn't know it was because he was gonna break up with me. I forgot to tell you but he doesn't go to my school. When he moved out here from Idaho he went to West Canyon High because he was living with his auntie at the time, which he met Fjeran. As soon as his parents got a house he thought he was gonna be able to move to Cedar Ridge High but he ended up moving to the high school five or so miles away from us. Pine Shore High School, home of the Ospreys. Their one out of two of our rival schools. A lot of my friends go to his high school so I don't exactly completely dislike his school." I told Ms. Peony, trying to get my mind off of the urge to cry.

     "Do you think he brooke up with you because he cared?" Ms. Peony looked at me with a little worry in her eyes.

     "What do you mean? If he cared he would still be with me, right?" I said confused.

     Ms. Peony shook her head. "No amber. What I'm saying is that do you think there was a possibility that he wanted you to go and explore your last years of high school without him because you didn't attend the same school. Or maybe he was saving you from something that he could have done. He probably broke up with you because he possibly has a history of cheating on girls and he cared and didn't want to hurt you in that way." Ms. Peony explained.

     I was shocked. "You know what, Ms. Peony, maybe that could be a reason. But I don't know because he never gave the time of day to tell me. But thank you for opening my eyes to a new idea and thought of what the cause of it may have been." I said as my heart dropped a bit. 

     "You're welcome." Ms. Peony said with a subtle smile on her face. "Well, amber this ends our session for today. I'll see you in two weeks." 

    "Thank you so much peony, this is helping out a lot." I said with a smile on my face as I walked out her office door.

     As soon as I walked out the door my phone buzzed with a text message from my dad saying 'I'm here, look up'. As I looked up my dads car was parked on the curb. His brown Honda CRV covered in rain droplets. The window rolled down as I came close to the car. 

     "Hey amber." My dad said with a worried smile on his face, "It's nice to see you. Have you been working out?"

     "Oh yeah dad, I've just gone through fucking three months of running and training every day for track. But oh! Thats right! You wouldn't know that because you haven't FUCKING BEEN DOWN HERE!" I yelled at my dad with rage in my voice. I was surprised to see him. I hadn't seen him ever since christmas, two days after Brady and I were in a relationship.

     "Amber. Just. Please get in the car so we can talk?" My dad said with hurt in his tone. I cooperated with him because I seriously wanted to talk to him. My dad is my hero, and the fact that he's been absent from my life a lot has been hard on me. Most of my traits I pick up from him. We are so compatible but its just hard because he left for so long and he goes periods on end without coming up or without contacting me and it pisses me off. He is a bottled up person and I hate that. He needs to tell me whats going on all the time because I'm tired of how he acts.

     "Okay." I said with hesitation, as I got into the car. He drove away from Ms. Peony's office. I knew he was going to take me to my favorite place, Foggy Point trails.