Anthology - A Collection of Fanfic One-Shots

A Stitch in Time Part 4

Tom

Will is your son.

I stagger to the nearest chair, reaching out a hand to steady myself as I collapse onto it.

Will is your son.

The words rocket around inside my brain.

Will is your son.

My vision blurs, my mind's eye taking over and showing me only the two fleeting glimpses of him I've had so far, playing on endless repeat.

Will is your son.

My son. My son. I have a son. Which means...

"I'm a father." I'm barely aware of having spoken the words aloud until I hear Cat's reply.

"Yes. Tom, I'm so sorry, I..." I blink forcefully to bring her into focus. "I tried to let you know, when I found out..."

The connection clicks. "The texts and phone call."

"Yes."

"That was five years ago, Cat. Five years. You couldn't have tried again at some point during that time?"

"And how exactly would I have done that,Tom? You made it patently clear seven years ago that your career was more important to you than me. I had no clue how to get in touch with you other than your mobile number - no address, no idea who I could contact."

I want to maintain my anger at her for keeping this from me but when she raises those points, I can't deny the truth of them. My shoulders slump. "You're right, I'm sorry. You made an effort, which is more than I did after that night. After any of it, if I'm being truthful." I wonder how I would have reacted five years ago. I like to think I'm honorable enough to have done the right thing by her. "Cat, I..." I stop, unsure how to proceed.

"It's okay," she murmurs. "I know this is a lot to process and I don't expect you to do anything, I just...thought you should know."

I nod. "Can I..." I lick lips drier than a desert. "Could I meet him?"

She stills, so immobile that without being able to feel the pulse beating erratically at her wrist, I would barely know she was still breathing. Seconds that feel like hours pass until she responds, dragging a deep breath into her lungs.

"He doesn't know about you." Distant birdsong almost drowns her softly spoken words. "I don't want him to get to know you and then be hurt when you leave." Her words feel like a sharp blade to the chest but I have to acknowledge the validity of her assumption. Why would she think I'd stick around and be in his life? We live on opposite sides of the globe, for starters, not to mention my hectic schedule. "I'm sorry Tom, but his happiness and welfare are my first concern."

"Of course," I try to give her a smile, even though my heart's in knots. "I understand, and that's exactly as it should be."

We sit in silence for a while as a myriad of emotions toss me around like a feather in a storm until eventually it's too much and I let go her hand, rising to my feet. "I should go," I tell her, "and let you get back to your family."

Family. My son. God, I need to get out of here and think.

Cat stands too and although I don't meet her eyes, I feel their intensity. "Tom," she whispers, "wait just a minute, please." When I still she goes inside the house quickly and I see her moving around before she passes back through the door and holds something out to me. "For you. Don't...don't open it until you're somewhere private. And...I put my mobile number in there too, so...when you've had time to think, if you want to, you can call me. To talk, or..."