CHAPTER FOURTEEN xiv. "NO MORE. GOD PLEASE, NO MORE."
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RUTH
SHE FELT A TIGHTNESS IN HER CHEST that was almost painful. It tugged on her vocal chords, leaving her in a silence that was broken by Lori's loud breathing. Ruth looked around at her surroundings, observing the way the metal walls were orange, coated in a rust that smelled worse the longer she breathed it. Her hand was limp in Lori's grip, but the woman still squeezed it to help with the painful sensation.
The world was cruel to them. All of them. It was cruel to Carl. Carl was young, innocent, and way too naive to understand the way this world worked. He would never know how growing up normally would feel. He would never go to school, marry, work. All he could do was survive and hope he didn't die before then.
It was cruel to Maggie, who almost lost her father just a few days ago. Death was a normalcy now, if it wasn't already before. It seemed to hit harder, feeding on the hope of survivors.
It was cruel to Ruth. Her mind was burdened by the losses in her wake. The world cursed her, making her one of the most unlucky people to exist. She couldn't sit here and watch as her friend slowly faded in her arms.
"L-Lori... I don't know-" Ruth paused in between a shaky breath. "I don't know how to help. I don't know."
"That's okay." Lori said quietly. Her breathing was still loud, and her eyes were shut closed as she winced over and over again. "It's okay, Ruth."
The world was cruel to Lori, too. She had to go through childbirth without medicine, proper sanitation, and anything that could even possibly help the baby survive this world. It was cruel to her in more ways than one. Ruth watched her breathe out a heavy sigh, her eyes set on Ruth, who stared down at her.
"I'm not gonna make it." Lori mumbled. A loud pang hit her ears, but it wasn't the cold metal floors and walls that created the noise. It was her heart as it beat loudly in her ears. Shock wasn't supposed to be painful, but for some reason this was. Lori couldn't die, not when Ruth got to live. She couldn't prevent this, no matter how much she tried. She couldn't place herself in the line of fire, because there was no fire to get hit with.
"You are, Lor." Ruth smiled sadly. "You're gonna get through this." The words felt useless, for Ruth couldn't even believe them herself. The hand that Lori gripped began to shake as her eyes felt the burning feeling that preceded the drops in her warm, gentle stare.
Lori's eyes had formed tears as well, and a soft smile adorned her lips despite the pain. "It's my time, Ruthie. I've lived my life, and now you need to live yours. No more-" She sharply inhaled, and the water that was settling in her tear ducts spilled over the edge and onto her cheeks. "No more watching over me. Watching over yourself, over Carl, anyone you feel like."
