der diary,
i alwayz wanted 2 go 2 a wandi concert and know wat itd be lyk.
but i cant cuz i only have 20 dollarz in mah pocket.
this aint fuckin awesome.
but suddenly a lightbulb shows up on mah head. it made meh look lyk a genius but leum will alwayz be smartur ryt.
anywayz i have a brilleum idea!!11!! i dnt care if this makez zero senze okeh.
my plan iz; if i wanna go to le wandi concert i can alweyz steal. i know it soundz stupid but YOLO.
i know sum1 who has wandi ticketz, she posted about it on tweeter. she only livez next door.
luv it.
so 2nyt i am gonna slowly climb up her window and sneak in her room suspiciously. when i finally snatch her wandi ticketz i am gonna quietly dance lyk a freakin obese monkey cuz it soundz lyk fun.
so le time iz already 12:00 am. i will start mah mission in about 5 secondz.
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omg i finally got the ticketz!!11!!
dont ask. i simply motivated lew's ass.
Zo i now have two ticketz 4 le concert and i am very happy!!1! altho im not gonna use le other one so u can have it *le gives it to you*
zo le concert will start at 5:30 pm. alryt i am gonna w8 4 5 more hourz which meanz i still have more tym to spend mah shitty day.
ok i thnk im done.
4 mah breakfazt i already ate mashed potatoez, newbaby potatoez, baked potatoez, roasted potatoez and lastly, fried chickin.
i alzo worked on mah wandi blog. i know i already told u that im nut gud at it but afterall itz mah bodeh i can do whut i want.
and laztly i went 2 tailor swift'z meet&greet with mah dog named josh who iz a swifty. i dont blame him 4 bein one. and just zo ya know i found out dat he iz a swifty wen i frzt saw him peein on a tailor swift magezine. it waz peein awesum!!11!!!
az soon az we met her mah dog quickly flew on hur perfectly flawlezz face and licked it oops dat naughty fuckin basturd!!1!!
but ya know whut itz weird cuz she kept smilin at meh i mean she waznt even mad or dizgusted.
well i waz expectin hur 2 scream at uz sayin "I KNEW U WER TROUBLE WEN U WALKED IN!!1!!1" but she didnt so omg i thank le heavenz 4 dat.
pluz she rlly needz 2 go 2 le mental hospital 4 she waz literlly starin and smilin at meh and mah dog for the past 69 secondz omg dis iz just zo weird and akwrd.
after dat meh and mah dog just decided 2 leave. as we wur just leavin i shouted rlly loud to her lyk a freakin dying walruz sayin "HASTA LA VIZTA, BITCH!!1!!1!" but she waz still smilin omg she rlly iz nice afterall.
at home i lazily turnd on da radio and derz dis guy in it sayin "here is a new song by taylor swift called 'The Bitch and The Dog'"
wow she waz so fazt.
luv it.
okeh zo todayz the perfect tym 2 go 2 le wandi concert cuz itz lyk 5:30 pm.
i went 2 da wandi concert with mah batmobile (cuz lyk every directioner haz one duhhh) and after a gud several minute i waz finally der.
i went in and handed my ticketz and everythin.
i went uncontrollably excitd cuz lyk am finally gonna see dem live and get heiry to rape meh and wer gonna have beautiful sexy babies!!1! omg i cant w8 2 lick hiz other 2 niplez az soon as we'll hav sex.
itz da tym 4 everyone 2 get in da arena.
i waznt der at da signing cuz dey sed i didnt hav any wandi stuff 4 dem 2 sign. i went all mad and crazy and zo i flashed paul mah boobz snd told him "diz is what der gonna sign!!1!!"
he kicked me out.
luv it.
anywayz da concert waz about 2 start. directionerz wur screamin der namez but i was screamin for pizza.
im hungry.
sum gavee glarez and showed me der middle fingerz.
luv it.
zo le boyz all showed up on stage and dey look zo per-pect!!1! only i couldnt see dem very well cuz i was at the very back of da arena.
but i dont mind.
i luv it.
dey sang all da up all eve, take me out and daytym memoriez songz and i received lotz of glarez and starez while i waz singin along the lyricz. maybe i got da lyricz wrong
i dont care.
i luv it.
finally dey stopped singin and started talkin to uz all.
"To that fan over there at row 10000000000" i heard someone sed dat over da mic in hiz deep raspy voice. suddnly all of de fanz looked at meh lyk i just killed sum1 wtf.
after a while i relized dat heiry just called meh omg im literlly fangurlin ryt now!!!1!!
ME GUSTA.
"guess what love?!" omg i waz probbly the firzt gurl dat he ever called love.
BITCHEZ BE JEALEWS.
"it's your lucky day bc i'll love you till the day i die! and so, will u marry me?" he sed it in an irish accent.
luv it.
i stared into hiz deep brown orbz no mattur how far dey wur.
and turns out hez tellin da truth.
"YEZ!!1! YEZZZ!!1! YEZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ" i forgot hiz name cuz i waz mindblown so i just sed yez.
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suddenly i woke up.
it waz actully all just a dream.
but still.
i luvd it.
luv,
a dreamerectioner x
hey guys! sooo um should i continue the story or nah? :p
