ZAHJEN
5 years agoI feel like a prisoner here.
I have been following the same routine for a week now. If you think having a change of scenery will change your life then you're wrong. I know I'm being dramatic but I can't help it.
Following a routine as it gets very annoying to me; barely having any human interaction is making me insane.
I wake up knowing exactly what my day will consist of, grocery shopping, 6 hrs of tv series, and nothing thrilling or adventurous, at least that's what I've been experiencing all week.
Turkey is a beautiful country indeed, and even a deep breath makes you feel refreshed and blissful, but I can't help being agitated.
The awkwardness between Yaqtan and I hasn't dissolved yet, it's been a week today, but we've shared mere words, mostly due to his long hours at work, so when he's leaving I'm sleeping, and when he comes back I pretend to sleep. I feel a pang of guilt for doing this, but at the same time, I can't handle the painful silence between us.
I finally get up from my bed, glancing at my left and noticing that Yaqtan has already gone to work, as usual. I boringly walk towards the washroom with my eyes squinting at the bright light from the windows.
"Did I forget to draw the curtains last night?" I ask myself.
Confused, as I walk towards the bathroom, I hear a clatter. Somebody is in the living room. But who? An intruder?
"I'm not prepared for this.." I think.
I hide behind the wall, waiting, thinking of a way to handle this situation. Maybe if I stay quiet enough, he'll leave without harming me. That's when the clatter stops. As if whoever it is has sensed my presence.
I screw up my eyes and try to control my sobbing.
Footsteps come towards me. I say a silent prayer, waiting for the blow.
Somebody grabs my shoulders and that's when I let out a loud cry.
"What's wrong?.." I hear the voice that I never knew could be so soothing. I open my eyes and will myself to look up at him.
"I thought there was a burglar in the house." I sob out trying to control my tears but they keep falling.
Just then he puts his arms around me and holds me tight. "Shh... It's all okay. There's no burglar, I forgot to tell you, I'm not working today" He rubs my back to calm me down. "I'll never let anything bad happen to you. I'm here to protect you." I feel my panic subsiding and the warmth of his embrace taking its place.
He wipes a tear with the back of his hand then tucks away a loose strand of hair behind my ear, making me blush.
"Let's go out. I feel terrible for not being able to show you around yet. I'm sorry."
You found parts of me, that I didn't know existed, and in you, I found a love, I no longer believed was real."