I'm Fucked Up

1 am thoughts

So yoyoyo is your girl Emily. If you are new idc I am not writing a book. Why tf would I do that. Anyways. I am here on this night to rant about stupid people and stupid things and things I think. I don't really care about spelling mistakes. This Isn't a book. Okai rant time.

So I am stretching my ears for gauges and I had to buy lube. Cause its easier to stretch. Vaseline is all clumpy. Anyways I needed to get the K.P. ,or something like that, brand cause its water based. And I go to buy it. I'm alone cauee my mother is lazy and wanted me to just go in. I was in a sex store buying lube. And omfg it was wild. It wasn't the first time I've been in one (; so I knew my way around. And they didnt have the kind I needed so I asked the man up front if they had it in the back. Let me tell you what this guy looked like. So he was plumo and he was bald and was old. If anyone from pottsboro is reading this he looked like coach Henderson. So I ask and he gives me the like really creepy look and goes "how old are you?" Like not in a nice way like really fucking rude. And I say "I'm 14." After I said that he was like sure abd went to look for it. And I heard this bitch say under his breath "I would fuck her" and I pretend I didn't hear him. And I bought the correct lube and as I'm walking out of the store I say "I would fuck me too" and I wink amd slap my ass. This was great cause his face was priceless. Omfg it was a great thing. I am so glad that I am me. Like 8 years ago I didn't even know what a sex store was but NOW I'm doing shit like that. I'm wild. Anyways the end I got my lube and brought it home. And this bitch gave me the wrong kind well it wasn't wromg but it was cherry flavor. I WAS LET DOWN. warning cherry lube does NOT taste like cherry at all.

THE END

Hope you mofos enjoyed. I'm here whenever I want to be. This thing what ever you want to call it is probs just gona be story times. Alright bye ugly ♡