Chapter 4: Secrets and Confessions

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Dear Diary,

I woke up to Ryan's head leaning against my hip and Beth's knees bent up by mine. I had one foot of the bed and a carton of ice-cream between my arm and my side. "Guys?..." I yawned. I rubbed my eyes and looked around some more, noticing Ryan was still asleep. He's kinda cute when he's asleep, the world's a lot more peaceful when he is too. I twitched my foot, smacking Beth in the stomach, waking her up.

"What?" she groaned.

"I'm hungry...and it's morning. We need to clean up before your mom wakes up." I said. Beth sat up and stared at her brother, who was still asleep against my hip. She shook her head then smacked him with a pillow causing him to snort and look up at us causing us both to laugh at him. I sat up and picked up the ice-cream carton; Ryan moved over to grab his and we went down to the kitchen together. We threw the cartons away and put the spoons in the sink. I was about to go back upstairs when Ryan grabbed my hand, causing me to stop and look at him.

"Can I talk to you about something? Something important?" he asked.

"Of course! Ryan, we're friends it's what I'm here for." I said.

"Well..." he started but was cut off by Beth who bounded into the kitchen all happy.

"Alright who wants breakfast!" she cheered. I watched her as she jumped in front of the fridge and started looking for something to cook; looking back at Ryan, I realized he was still holding my hand, so I pulled away.

"Why don't we go out for breakfast?" I asked, "It saves your mom from having to do dishes.."

Beth shrugged, "I'm the one who does dishes and it doesn't bother me to do them." I nodded and walked over to help her decide on what to make. I opened the freezer and pulled out the waffle box.

"Waffles and sausage?" I asked with a huge smile.

"Sure," she laughed. I grinned happily and went into the living room to wait. I plopped down on the couch with one foot bent up under me. Ryan, of course, followed me. I took my hair out of the ponytail and ran my fingers through it, pulling out any knots I could. Irritated, I went upstairs to get my brush; sitting in front of the mirror I brushed my hair at the ends and worked my way up.

"Let me help you..." Ryan said, causing me to jump. Why was he following me? It was really unlike him and really weird. He took the brush from me and started to run it through my hair. He smiled contently as he did so. "You should keep your hair down more." he said.

"Why?" I questioned.

"You're a lot prettier with it down." he stated. I nodded. Wait..Ryan thinks I'm pretty? Was he flirting or was it just a compliment? I sat there wondering about it while he did whatever with my hair. When I came too from my thoughts my hair was parted to the left and I looked completely different. "See?" he asked and smiled. He put the brush back into my bag and went to my clothes.

"Now what are you doing?" I questioned, turning to look at him.

"Helping you pick out clothes..." he said as he continued looking. Again...weird? He pulled out a pair of jeans that had holes in the knees and a black T-shirt. "Put this on...I'll be back." he said and left the room. I sat there for a minute, trying to register what was happening; shaking it off I got up and slipped into the clothes he laid out. I was back in front of the mirror to see what he was turning me into. Even though I was barefoot, I was still beautiful. I didn't look like I belonged to a nut and a drunk.

"Breakfast is done!" Beth called. I was just about to walk down the stairs when Ryan called my name.

"Kelly hold on a minute." he said as he came to me, "Your outfit looks a little bland."

"What?" I sighed looking at him confused.

"Maybe you could use this..." he said and held up a necklace.

I gasped, "Ryan it's beautiful!"

"Well a beautiful necklace should belong to a beautiful girl." he stated, "So what do you say, will you take care of it until I find one?" I looked at him offendedly.

"Ohh you ass!" I laughed and pushed him. He lifted it over my head from behind me and clasped it around my neck. It was a beautiful diamond heart that stopped in the middle of my chest. As soon as he let go I ran off downstairs so Beth didn't question anything. I sat at the table and smiled at her.

"Oh your hair's down. Looks cute." she complimented, which made me put my hair back up in a ponytail. I awkwardly glanced at Ryan who was watching his sister put waffles on a plate. I had a strange feeling in my stomach, a feeling that was hard to explain. Beth put a plate of waffles in front of me and for some reason I almost didn't want to eat them. I felt sick. Maybe it's just because I'm hungry. So I took a bite. My attention was brought to whoever was sitting in front of me- which just happened to be Ryan. He smiled at me and the sick feeling deepened. What if he judges me by the way I eat? I quickly shook the thought and continued eating, casually catching myself glancing up to look at him. What was going on with me? Why was he so cute?

Did I like Ryan?!

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After breakfast we all were chilling in the living room watching tv when all of a sudden Beth got up to go upstairs for something. As soon as she was gone Ryan jumped up, causing me to look at him. "Okay I don't know how much time I have...but I need to tell you." he panted with a look of pain on his face. Before I could say anything he continued, "Kelly, a few months before school started I developed a crush on you and I tried to ignore it because we're friends, but I can't anymore. I think about you nonstop. I can't help but want to be around you all the time..."

I looked at him with confusion, "Did you feel sick?"

"Yeah, there for the longest time I did. I was nervous you'd judge me by what I did." he said and I took a deep breath and looked away. "I think I have feelings for you Kelly..." he said.

" he said

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