I just wish... | Phil x Reader

Your Best friend Phil..

You start to drive to your best friend's house Phil you know he would let you crash there for a while, sobbing harder as you thought about how much for a failure you are to everyone.
You so fat
Why are you still alive?
Hahaha
You fail of a child

You grip the steering wheel tight as your knuckles go white and cry harder. The voices won't leave your head.

-TIME SKIP-

You arrive at Phils apartment and knock on his door.
*KNOCK*
*KNOCK*
You do even know if he is awake seening as it's now 12:30Am and thats when my thoughts get cancled out and you see the door swing open.
"Y/n?" He answers with a raspy voice.
Without replying you jump in his arms and hug him,crying harder into his chest sure to leave a makeup stain.
"Him again?" He answered
You nod
He knows you too well.
"C-can i stay here for a while?" You ask stuttering
"Of course you can! your always welcome y/n" he replys as he let's you into his house.
"Explain" he simply states whilst crossing his arms across his chest.
"I come home from work and all i wanted to do was cuddle with r/p/n and i walked in and seen him urm" you started to cry again.
"Oh y/n" he pulls you into a huge bear hug and everytime you tried to pull away he only hugged you tighter.
You yawn while he was still hugging you and thats when you and phil desided it was probably best to go to bed.
You walk into his room and he throws you one of his shirts to wear to bed and before you ask i have done this multiple times so its no longer awkward.
He gets into bed and pulls the blanket over so you can get in, Once you get into bed he spoons you, you see h e always did this whenever r-p-n would do something to upset you but this time you weren't going to go back to him.
"Phil?"
"Hm?"
"Why am i so stupid?"
"Your not! Why would you think that?"
"I always go back to him and he always does it to me..im not going back again"
"Y/n your not stupid you smart! And..i..anyway are you okay now?"

Phils pov

You hug y/n and think about how you just messed up bad you just hope y/n didn't realize you can't let her know..you can't mess up your friendship you cant risk it
"Im ok now" She smiled
Damn that smile always gets you
"Thats good" you smile back
You know she doesnt love you back at least thats what you think..