that was such a long title omg is this a p!atd song?
ok first off, i went shopping today and spent way too much on a jacket (hot topic prices are just omg) and i have a problem where i'm buying so much stuff recently and spending all my money. idk what to do though??
second, my dad and his parents think gender and sexuality jokes are funny? i've been trying to tell them that you can't apply genders to colours or clothing, and that for people it's a spectrum but they use it as joke. for example they were talking about vampires (???) and my grandpa yelled "monsters don't have genders!!!1! lol i'm so funny" and they all act like it's hilarious? but it's not? seriously i've been questioning my gender for a while (wow it feels crazy to admit that to someone) and i would really love if they'd stop. also, i wish they would be more accepting bc i really want some support.
tw; self harm
finally, i relapsed. i hate saying that and telling people but nobody reads this anyway, and if they do, i feel like being completely honest about this is for the best. i don't how to tell my therapist, and i'm too scared to tell my parents. i regret doing it just because of my anxiety now, and i wish i would have the courage to throw all my self harm tools away. it scares me to think that i wouldn't have them though, they comfort me in a sort of sickeningly twisted away.
anyway though, if you need anyone to talk to or vent to, i'm here for you. i will also gladly accept advice on what to do. thanks for reading, you're amazing and ily.
