6. Other People's Husbands

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Akudo was extremely late and I'm not even sure who was more pissed between me and Derin

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Akudo was extremely late and I'm not even sure who was more pissed between me and Derin.

His friends weren't even online and losing to Japanese players just wasn't as fun without the pidgin/slang, smack talking, back and forth between us - so gaming only got us so far.

I suggested Netflix but he didn't want to watch any of the trending shows without her. So freaking sweet but sad news for Netflixless me who'd been looking forward to her GOT fix.

This left very little for either of us to do but mope and, in my case, regret the longa throat that brought me there.

It is at times like this that one might, while deeply engrossed in the lovely upholstery of a quite tasteful couch (so as not to be engrossed in the matter at hand), become aware of how hideously awkward hanging out with a friend's hubby sans friend can actually be. Even when it's Derin and me who actually really get along.

I almost fell off the lovely upholstry from enthusiasm when my phone rang.

It wasn't glasses/club guy but it was Maminat and that was still nice.

"Maminat!" I cried into my phone joyfully, "where are you?"

"At home?" she answered briskly, "Look, Gigi, should I buy a tree?"

As usual I was caught off guard.

"A tree." I drew the word out like it had 27 consonants and I needed to spell it.

"Leaves, trunk, roots?" Maminat contributed helpfully.

"Why do you want to buy a tree? I mean not that you shouldn't if you want to -"

"Because my house is devoid of life," this said with deepest, darkest dissatisfaction, "I just realized it during meditation."

"That's not true, Maminat, you have all those cacti and - those - things with the fat leaves - "

"my Succulents" Maminat said the word with relish and my nose drew up cos it always sounds so wrong when she does that.

"Yeah, your nasty name thingys..."

"Gigi be serious, when I say a TREE obviously I'm talking about BIG life, not tiny, cute life,"

I was swiftly losing my enthusiasm for this rescue call.

"Babe, I'm not against you buying a tree - "

"Good. I want a feminine tree. A fruit tree."

"Fruit trees get insects," I warned from my vast experience of a one day stint at my secondary school's Gardening Club.

"I like insects." Maminat said which I should have seen coming. "Ok, lemme go check online - "

"Wait!" I cried out a tad loudly as she was about to hang up.

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