insufficient || larry au

03 || This Is It ||

                 

“Stay with me, don’t disappear. To tell the truth, I need you here. I’m afraid, I can barely breathe. I need your words, to comfort me.”

            

                       

Chapter 03 || This Is It ||

 

H

It is seven o’clock in the morning when I wake up. I try to remember what happened prior to this moment but I am going blank. I start to get frustrated, but I quickly recover and stand to my feet. It takes only a few seconds for the dizziness to disappear and I am shoving my shoes on before I can convince myself not to. I exit the house without being caught and I push my sleeves further down.

I finally reach my house in several minutes and I am thankful that neither of my parents cares enough to stay home. (It’s funny because this will always be my house but it will never be my home.) I go upstairs and throw myself on my bed but all thoughts of getting some more sleep vanish.

Ever since I left Zayn’s house, I feel weaker. Not physically, but emotionally. I feel like they both have seen me in my worst moment and I can’t handle it; the last thing I need is Zayn telling everyone at school my faults and Louis just standing back, letting him.

Which I am sure would happen if I allow it. The thing is I don’t know if I would do anything to stop it. Yes, I am flattered that they cared enough to take me out of the freezing outdoors but I am hurt. I am hurt and I do not know why. They were being nice so why should I be worried about any misfortunes?

Before I can finish arguing with myself, there is an urgent knock at the door. I am curious as to who would be knocking on my bedroom door but I quickly knowledge that it is the front door and mentally slap myself. Looking through the peephole, I take in Louis’ appearance; he is wearing yesterday’s clothes but I do not mind.

“Louis, I am extremely busy. Please go away and don’t come back.”

“Harry, please open the door. I need to know you’re okay.”

“Well, congratulations because your conscience is clear; I am fine. Please leave.”

“I’m not leaving until you invite me in.”

I ignore him and walk towards the kitchen, making a cup of tea. I start feeling guilty soon after I am half way done with the drink. I walk back to the door and notice that he is gone. I slowly open the door and realize that he is leaning against it. I attempt to close the door back, but he gets in too hastily.

“Was that so hard?” He teases but he is smiling so I assume he is joking.

“Very.”

He looks me up and down and I am exceedingly self conscious. “Would you like some tea?”

“That would be lovely, thank you.”

I rush to the kitchen again and he follows. I make another cup and hand it to him fresh. He smiles and thanks me repeatedly before taking a drink and sighing in content.

“Absolutely amazing.”

“Thank you,” I mutter softly, sipping on mine. “I do not mean to be rude, but why exactly are you here?”

“To check up on you; you left without a single word this morning.”

“I didn’t want to disrupt yours or Zayn’s slumber.”