gang related ≠ d.l

29

I sat down on the couch, flipping on the tv. All the boys were out, so that means im home alone and can do whatever I want to. So far Ive done nothing except for sit around in a sports bra and shorts. Derek and all the guys are out, for a meeting with a new cartel. Ever since I saw that car drive by, I've been very cautious around the house. We've set up cameras in the living room. the front yard, the porch, the sides of the house, and the back of the house. I haven't seen the car drive by since that day, but I'm still very well aware of my surroundings. Nate hasn't been home in a few days, which worries me. He said he had business to take care of, which, knowing him, could mean so many different things. He hasn't texted me, which he's usually blowing my phone up, and he hasn't called me. I feel like he's hiding something from me. All the guys have been acting strange, and I don't like it one bit. They're more secretive than they were a month ago, and every time I come around, they're moods change drastically. I don't know if they're devising an evil plan, or if something bad is going to happen, and they have a hunch. What ever it is, I'm finding out. 

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I hear the front door open, and keys thrown down on the table by the door. "Karina? You here?" Derek calls, walking down the corridor.

 "Yeah, I'm in the living room, why?" I ask, him coming into view.

 "i was just wondering where you were," he shrugged.

 "Okay," I sighed, him sitting down beside me. It stayed silent for a few minutes, as I built up enough courage to ask him "Is everything okay? You guys have been acting so strange lately and you're freaking me out." I quickly say, causing him to look at me.

 "Yeah, every things fine. We're just really worried about this new cartel," He said, looking at me. "Derek James Luh, you better not be lying to me," I said, giving him a stern look. "Listen, its nothing for you to worry about, okay? Keep to yourself, stop worrying about us, we're adults, we can handle ourselves," He snapped. "Keep to myself? You guys are family, Derek, I know when somethings wrong. I can't keep to myself, because anything that happens in this house, I deserve to know too. Anything that happens in this gang, I deserve to know too. I'm a part of this gang just as much as you, or anyone else is, okay? So I'll be damned if its nothing for me to worry about." I said, crossing my arms.

 "If it involved you, I'd tell you, Rin, but it doesn't. You can't always be the boss," He grumbled, looking at me. 

"Always be the boss? Who said anything about me always being the boss? Cause I sure as hell didn't. I'm here for you guys, I'm always going to be stuck all up in your asses, cause thats the type of person I am, and you cannot change that, Derek. So please, tell me whats wrong." I spoke quietly. 

"You wanna know so bad? Fine, I'll tell you, but don't expect me to baby you when you find out," He scoffed. "What?" I asked. "Its Nate, we found him. He's not who he was." Derek explained. "What do you mean by that?" I said, my palms turning sweaty, my ears feeling hot. "He's with my dad, Karina, and they're wanting you to join them, too." He said, looking into my eyes. "Well, they're not getting me, and I'll be damned if they do. I don't know what's up with Nate, but I'm not turning on you guys. I'm here to stay." I said, grabbing his hands. He looked so worried, so afraid. 

"Do you think I'd leave you, D?" I whispered. "I-I don't know, its just, you've always stayed by Nate's side through out it all, and I'm scared you'd leave. I'm scared of losing you, Rin." He said, his voice cracking. "Derek, I'd never hurt you, ever. I love you too much to do something like that." I said, causing him to look into my eyes. "I love you too, Karina, so so much." he whispered, squeezing  my hand. As he looked at me, his glossy brown eyes melting into my heart, I realized that I could never love someone as much as I love this boy. He was who I wanted to spend the rest of my life with, he was the one. He was the reason I'm here today, that I'm able to see my gang family. That I can finally say I'm home. That I can say I'm in love with a gang member. That I'm in love with my ex-kidnapper, my ex-rival. And I'll be damned if anything gets in my way. 

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IM SO SORRY I MADE YOU GUYS WAIT SO LONG FOR AN UPDATE, BUT IVE BEEN SOOO BUSY WITH SCHOOL, ITS LEGIT CRAZY. Also, my birthday is in 14 days, and Im excited. 

in other news, i no longer have a phone bc i took pictures while in the tub. Heres the story: So i got a new bath bomb yesterday, and the girl told me there was essential oils in it. I made my bath later that night, and put the bath bomb in there. When it was done activating, I noticed an oily film on my water. So i pulled out my phone and started recording the bath water. I explained what the lady said, and proceeded to show them the oily water. Side note, I actually loved how smooth it made my skin afterwards. Anyways, you could see a small piece of my thigh in the video. I didnt think much of it, so i posted it to my story. (all this was on snapchat). This morning i wake up to see my mom had snapped me, saying i dont need to post stuff like that. Then, my dad gets home from the store, and asks to see my phone, and wants to know what the password is, Of course, being a good child, I tell him my password, and he walks OVER TO MY BROTHER AND GOES "SHOW ME WHERE THOSE PICTURES ARE" AND PROCEEDS TO LOOK THROUGH MY SNAP MEMORIES, AND MY STORY, TO SEE ME LIP SYNCING TO CARDI B IN A TOWEL (mind you that cardi b vid was last weekend) and then he sees the bath bomb vid from last night (9/30) and locks my phone, and tells me i no longer have a phone, and that its his now. So i start getting emotional, and then he goes, "Also, I thought i told you to never talk to (we'll say her name is lolo" Lolo again? ALSO, your moms coming to get you, so you need to get all your stuff ready" and so i start BAWLING MY EYES OUT and grab the hw i was working on, put it on the side table, and get up and start walking to my room, crying. he goes, "emma come outside, put some shoes on so your feet dont freeze, and come outside. I want to talk to you" so i put on some flip flops and walk outside. he tells me that ive disrespected him, and that i shouldnt be talking to lolo. I told him the only reason i was talking to lolo was bc her mom was sick and she didnt have anyone else she could talk to about it besides me. and he said, you shouldve just told me that and i wouldve let you talk to her. you shouldnt do that stuff behind my back. then he ACTUALLY HUGGED ME. LIKE PHYSICALLY HUGGED ME GUYS. THIS IS A BIG STEP FOR ME. LIKE HE ACTUALLY SHOWED ME LOVE. and then i went to my moms and got my ass chewed out by her, for having a messy room. so todays been a roller coaster. idk how long i wont have my phone, so ill be using my new computer to update. :)))))) have a good day/night everyone. and ill see you next time. LOVE YOU ALL UNCONDITIONALLY