Blinded by the Light

eleven

The next Sunday was relaxing. It was the day before Reed and I were going back to school. Neither of us had been going for a while and we would have to catch up on a lot when we got back. Meanwhile, Reed and I were hanging out in his room while Sam was at work.

I was laying down and staring up at the ceiling while Reed was reading Paper Towns by John Green. I remembered the other day when I saw The Fault in Our Stars lying on his bedside table. "I see you liked The Fault in Our Stars so much you've been divinely inspired to read the whole emotional collection of John Green's." I commented. "I wanna take you to the movies to go see it with me." he stated, not looking up from his book. "Are you sure? It's a chick flick and it's probably really cheesy." I said as I propped myself up on my elbows. "It's romantic." he smirked as he looked up at me.

I giggled and threw a pillow at him. He laughed and put his book down. I glanced over to his guitar. I walked over, grabbed it and sat back down with it. "Teach me a song." I demanded. "Okay, what song?" he asked as he walked over and sat next to me on the bed.

"Under the Bridge by the Red Hot Chili Peppers." I smiled. He smiled back and began to place my fingers on the strings and commanded me to pluck certain ones. After about forty-five minutes, he had taught me the intro and the chords for the song.

When we were done, I noticed the music that was playing softly in the background. It was Creep by Radiohead. Reed got up and turned it up. "Oh, I love this song." I sighed as I put down the guitar. "You like Radiohead?" he asked me. "Yeah, they're awesome." I commented.

"Shit, you have the best taste in music, Ali." he chuckled as he wrapped his arms around me. "It's perfect make out music." I smirked. "Well in that case..." he whispered as he climbed on top of a giggling me and pushed his lips onto mine. I immediately felt the sparks and the butterflies. It was my favorite feeling in the entire world. When our lips moved together I could feel nothing else. Just our contact.

He spun us around so that I was now on top of him and he placed his hands on either side of my hips. "Ali.." he said as he kissed me. "Hmm.." I answered, our lips never loosing contact. "My phone's ringing." he laughed as he kissed me once more before leaning back up to answer the phone.

I climbed off of him and watched as he answered his phone. I stood up and walked over to his dresser to rummage through it. I was curious of what type of clothes he had. As I was searching through his top drawer, I heard rattling. My hand found its way to a pill bottle. As I took the pills out of the drawer and held it closely to my chest so Reed wouldn't see it, he hung up the phone and began walking over to me.

"It was just Sam. He said that he would be working a little late and to just order a pizza. What are you do-" he paused as I turned around and held up the bottle. "Xanax pills?" I questioned. "Ali-" he started as he attempted to grab the bottle from me. "Why do you have these?" I asked. He opened his mouth, but nothing came out, as if he were looking for something to say. "Do you actually have anxiety or are you just trying to get high?" I inquired. "Ali stop, I can explain-" he stepped forward, tears shining in his eyes. "If these aren't for medical reasons, Reed, I swear to God," I started to yell. "Please, just let me explain.." Reed began to cry as he sat on the bed. A tear rolled down my cheek as I sat down next to him and held the pills in my hand. There were only three left.

"I have an anxiety disorder." he said after a while. I stayed silent and looked at the ground. "My therapist told me to take them. He said it would help my depression." he explained. "You're depressed, too?" I raised my eyebrows at him. "I didn't want you to find out because I wanted to be the stronger person. I thought it would help you." he began crying again.

I sighed and rested my head on his shaking shoulder. My hearing focused on the song playing in the background: Jesus Christ by Brand New. "We're one in the same, Reed." I stated. "I was per-scripted those pills a year ago because I have anxiety. After a while I just became addicted to them and started getting high all the time. One time I tried to overdose, but it didn't work. I just threw them back up." I said.

"I'm glad you did." he replied after a while. "Don't get that bad. Please, just.. be careful with them." I shut my eyes. His shoulder seemed as if it were made for my head to lay on. "I love you, Ali." he said as he took my hand and squeezed it. "I love you too.." I sighed.

// this chapter was sort of descriptive and hard to write. i'm sorry about that, but i hope you liked it. i haven't been updating a lot lately and i'm sorry about that too but i'll try to more often now that i'm out of school. i had an idea for a new ashton fic so stay tuned for that! i love you guys so much and please share my story as much as you can, it would mean a lot a lot a lot :)

- Kayleigh //