I Own You

15.

A/N

Wow 500 votes! That is so amazing and beyond anything I expected. Thank you so much for your support and for liking my story.

And thank you for sticking with me despite my slow updates. I'm a full time student and wish I could be writing all the time, but unfortunately I can't. Thank you for your understanding and patience. I promise there is more to come! I'm going to try to have a more consistent schedule, although I'm not sure what that is just yet. If you guys have any reasonable suggestions, I'm totally open to them!

Hope you continue to enjoy the story!

Love you guys! xxx
- DDD

  ~*~  

The recognizable sound of the clinking of dishes wakes me up. I'm thankful to finally escape the nightmares. It's short lived relief, though. I groan and drop my head back against the pillow again as I realize that I may have just woken up to another one.

I pull the blanket around my shoulders and shuffle towards the kitchen. Devan has his back towards me as he does the dishes.

"You know I have a dishwasher for those."

"Good morning to you too," his voice warms me immediately, even with its condescending undertones.

"Sorry. Good morning. How'd you sleep."

He turns his head and shoots me a soft smile. "Surprisingly well."

This might not be a nightmare after all. "That's good to hear."

"But you probably didn't. I'm sorry I took your bed," he says as he turns away from me again.

I go to him and wrap my arms around his waist. For whatever reason, I just want to be close to him. Looking around him, I see that the sink is empty already, and I turn him by his waist to face me again. His head is still turned to the side, avoiding making eye contact. We clearly still haven't gotten past whatever had happened last night.

"Devan, look at me," I plead. When he doesn't I force him to by stepping into his line of sight and holding his face before he can turn away again. "What's going on?"

"I didn't want you to see me that way," he says softly. When I remain silent, he sighs and grabs me by the shoulders now staring straight into my eyes. "I lost control in more ways than one last night, and that's a feeling I cannot bear. And, I was there to comfort and protect you, not the other way around. I've probably lost all the trust you so graciously gave me, which I truly cherished. And..."

"Shhh," I put a finger on his lips. "Devan, it's okay. You can only be so strong. I understand. There's nothing to worry about. I still trust you. And, I was fine taking care of you."

He drops his head into the crook of my next and just holds me. We stand there, in each other's arms, for ages. His arms are wrapped tightly around my waist while I stroke his back lightly. After a little while longer, I feel his muscles tense and he straightens. The look on his face has gone from lost puppy back to his normal steel. He brushes a strand of hair out of my face and cups my cheeks, looking intently at my face, looking for anything that will give me away.

"Thank you, Ms. Keys," he begins, coolly. "I think I should be going now."

I open my mouth to say something, but he swiftly walks past me out of the kitchen. He grabs his coat and keys and leaves. Just like that, he was gone without another word, without another glance. And, just as quickly as the warmth had returned when he spoke, it was gone with the click of the door. I'm left staggered as the sudden change steals the air out of my lungs. After taking in some deep breaths and regaining my balance, I go through my morning routine, trying to make it seem like just a normal day. Still, the nagging knowledge that everything was far from normal had me on edge.

~*~

The water coming from the showerhead just doesn't seem to be getting any warmer, even though I know it's scalding already. I watch as my skin turns red. I just let it run over my head for a little while, trying to drown out the world. It doesn't work.

The towel seems more itchy and scratchy than normal. It feels like I'm rubbing sandpaper against a sunburn. I revel in the stinging of wiping the drops off my body, though. At least I can control how much it hurts. But, that doesn't help.

I take a wipe to my face, trying to clean off all the excess make up. It doesn't seem to want to come off, though. I can see my face turning red with the aggressive rubbing. I go a little longer, still not feeling clean, until I just break down into tears. It doesn't stop.

Why am I crying?

I slide to the ground and just stay like that until I can't cry anymore. I run out of breath. I run out of tears.

Numb, I get up and finish getting ready for the day. I brush my teeth and put my hair up. I put on a pair of sweats and an old baggy t-shirt. I almost break down again as I realize it's my dad's.

~*~

It's time to get rid of the evidence. I strip the bed and put everything in the washer. Then I head downstairs to continue the job. The blanket and pillow get put away. I fluff and neaten the couch. I drain the sink, put all the dishes away and wipe down the counters. I neaten up the bar stools at the island and straighten out the files I had carelessly left out from yesterday. I get out a rag and dust the whole downstairs. I think about sweeping and mopping, but I know that'd probably be a bit excessive considering I had done that just a couple days ago when I got home.

With everything done, I take a step back and relish the feeling of a clean house. For the first time since the intrusion, I feel at home, and I feel normal.

It's time to put the kettle on and get back to work. Within half an hour, I have a lovely cup of tea sitting next to a plate of warm pop tarts, while I begin flipping through stacks of papers.

Knock, knock, knock!

I grumble as a grab some paper towel to clean up the spilled tea. Obviously, I haven't recovered entirely if I'm so easily startled.

"Coming!" I say as I throw out the soggy tissue and rinse off my hands.

I rush to the door, but slow down as I approach it. The door. It betrayed me as it let in the perpetrator. It was weak when it let Devan leave. Now, it looks bigger and more intimidating than ever. I brace myself as I reach the handle and pull the door open, only to be met by a pleasant surprise.

"Hi!"