Funereal

pre-note

Once I nervously drank my coffee
as you told me about your years in high school
as if it had been years,
but it had only been one.

I laughed when you asked about mine
because I was only 15,
and you were in college.
It hit you before I could answer
and you smiled.

We were friends. 

I was the one
that convinced you to go to prom,
and to talk to the girls you liked,
and gave you their numbers.

I was the best pal a gal could have,
but you weren't a gal.

Even now, we've been friends for years,
but we're not just pals.
We're not just friends.
We've never been "just blank".

It's complicated,
and it always has been
complicated.
Maybe one day, you'll give me a label;
give us a label.

Right now, it's just you and me.
No, not youandme.
Just you and me.

So maybe
I'll spend the rest of my days
letting you lead me on.
I'll let you talk to any girl that breathes.
I'll let myself give you advice.
I'll let you say you love me.
I'll let myself believe you
even though I couldn't
possibly know if you were being
honest.

I'll let us be just us.
I'll let us be just you and me.
No, not youandme.
Just you and me.

Oh, and if you thought I was done,
you're wrong.
There is not a day that passes by
that I do not think of you.
I hope you make it big, like you want to.

Maybe I'll meet you in the crowd
after your show,
or maybe we'll meet at my bakery;
a slice of cookie cake and coffee.

Perhaps you'll ask
about my years in high school
and smile.

It'll be just you and me.
No, not youandme.
Just you and me.