Im anti jaebum

juu-go.5

Everything was black. But also everything was also .... gold. Why gold? No one knew. The soft black locks of the boy stuck together, sweat being the glue that holds the strands together. Tears, dirt, blood and sweat streak down the once lively face. Upstairs, a furious Matthew; his voice was echoing throughout the house and through the basement. He was screaming about something... about reactions... about getting no reaction from... youngjae. Youngjae's vision faded in and out, blinking the tears away. He felt sick. He tried to move his hands but something jingled and kept him back. When he looked up he saw that his arms were chained to the wall and slowly but surely everything came back to him. "J-Jaebum.." Once again those tears are streaming down his face, picking up the blood and dirt that was on his face. "Jaebum...Jaebum hyung..." He started to sob quietly. "I...I'm so sorry. I'm sorry jaebum. I should've given you the benefit of the doubt... i should've just given you an easier time. I should've never fought with you im sorry jaebum hyung. I'm sorry... im sorry im sorry i'm sorry." A loud burst came through the door from what seemed to be the upstairs but everything was still kind of blurry.

"Well, well, well. Looks like you finally woke up. Were our little sessions too much to handle?" Youngjae looked up to see Matthew staring down at him. "S-sessions? what do you...-" He looked down to see that his torso was bruised, deep bite marks and bruises and what looked that looked like open wounds. "What.... What did you do to me? D-Did you r-ra-" Matthew scoffed and shook his head, putting on some protective goggles. "No. I didn't rape you. I stopped because you started passing out from blood loss. I might be an asshole-" 'an asshole is a huge understatement' youngjae thought. "but i'm NO monster. People who do that are absolute blasphemy. Truly disgusting vile garbage that dont even deserve to rot in hell." Youngjae looked up and managed what was left of his strength to pull on the chains. "Don't bother. You wont get out." Youngjae blinked and let his eyes wander in the dim light of the room. "Y-You know.. jaebum will come for me." Matthew laughed loudly and looked over at him. "You really must be fucking stupid Choi. Your precious Jaebum is DEAD. He's GONE. SO NOW YOU CAN FUCKING FORGET HIM AND JUST LOVE .... ME. Or you can be a fucking cock slut, a penniless whore fucking your friends for money again. No wonder jaebum bullied you. Look at you. You're absolutely disgusting." Youngjae shut his eyes tight, shaking his head as if trying to disagree, tears streaming down his face. "stop it!!" "Or what? You can't do shit. You're weak and pathetic. What's so great about this whole thing was you believed jaebum's little lie didn't you?" Youngjae looked up to see him and Matthew were only inches away from each other's face. "W-What lie?" Matthew grabbed a fistful of youngjae's hair and scowled at him. "He never fucking loved you. He was just playing you. He was being nice to you, fucking you, doing all that out of pity. You never meant anything to him. Face it youngjae... You can't be loved. And now... look at what you did. YOU killed jaebum." Choked sobs left the raven haired boy as he heard these things. He couldn't pass out. He couldn't shake away the thoughts that Matthew was so mercilessly putting into his head. They seeped in, drowned his brain, suffocated his throat and churned his stomach in the worst way imaginable. In that small second as he heard the words and let out those choked sobs, he let it all really sink in. Jaebum was really gone... and it was his fault.

"Hey.... Hey buddy wake up. We can't plan this without your help or y'know... your consciousness." Everything was black. But also everything was... red. Why red? No one knows. Soft auburn locks stuck together with his own bodily liquid, in the background, an argument going on... people.. his friends.. yelling at someone asking what happened. Jaebum's blurred in and out until it finally came into full vision, his eyes squinting from the bright lights of the room. He looked around to see that everyone was there. Mark, Jinyoung, Jackson and Jseph. "What.... What happened?" Jaebum tried to sit up but yelled loudly at the sudden movement. He pulled his sheets back to see that there were about 3-4 stitches in his side. "We had to stitch you up here. I had to get a medical student because taking you to a hospital was too risky... If he found out you were still alive he would've hurt youngjae more." Jseph said softly. Jaebum's once tired, half dead expression became alive and alert. "Youngjae! where did he go? Jseph... What happened to him please tell me will he be okay? God fuck i should've stopped matthew i should've saved youngjae..." Jseph let his chin rest in his hands as jaebum felt a sink in the bed and looked to see that mark was rubbing his back. "I know this is hard to deal with jaebum but we have to stay calm. Think of the best plan to get youngjae back an Matthew behind bars.-" Jaebum pushed mark off of him and looked at him with disgust. "Don't fucking pretend like you care for youngjae you don't even know him! All you wanted was a quick fuck outa him and you got it you don't have to be bothering him anymore!" The other boys looked at jaebum and blinked, surprised at the sudden outburst. "Yah jaebum I care about youngjae just as much as you do okay? Don't act like this isn't affecting all of u-" Jaebum scoffed and rolled his eyes. "DO't fucking think for a SECOND that you care about youngjae as much as me okay? You don't know him. You don't know how i feel about him. So fuck off." "Jaebum what makes you so special huh? HOW ARE YOU SO FUCKING DIFFERENT FROM THE REST OF US?!" Mark yelled. Jaebum growled and yelled loudly, practically ripping the pillow in half. " BECAUSE I'M IN FUCKING LOVE WITH HIM. FUCK... I'm... oh my god." Jinyoung followed and so did jackson and mark with an "Oh... My god." The room was silent as jaebum stared into the pillow in his hands. "I... I'm in love with choi youngjae." "Well that's all the more reason to get him back now." Jseph said. Jaebum snapped out of it and looked up at J. "What do we have to do to get him back?" Jseph thought for a second. "Well i was planning an original sabotage. Eventually they're going to notice that youngjae is missing right? I figured that now that you're awake.. We make it look like you're trying to find him and him double crossing you guys by giving up little bread crumbs of the plan. Matthew is really smart when he isn't feeling as intense. When he expresses extreme emotion, that's when he's his most vulnerable. He doesn't think clearly and makes rash decisions. Ultimately we can use that to our advantage and get youngjae back. It'll take a while but.... We're going to get him back." Jaebum let the words seep in.. drown his mind and make his stomach churn with the same nervousness he felt that day youngjae almost died at the pool. He was able to get youngjae back then... He'll do whatever it takes to get him back now.

'Youngjae... We're coming to get you... Just hold on."

Holding on was something wish youngjae couldn't do right now. His body was once again so close to passing out he didn't think he could continue to live like this any longer. His mind was telling him to give in, he lost everything, there was nothing left to live for and that he was ready to die. All he needed to do was let go. But his heart was speaking through louder, telling him to fight to stay alive, to continue to breathe and feel until someone came to rescue him. The pain of jaebum's death giving him some hope of escaping as someone would notice that e and jaebum were gone by now. Either that or he has some really shit friends. Youngjae heard the sound of a blowtorch and his eyes shot wide open as he saw Matthew getting a hot branding iron ready. "M-Matthew what are you doing Matthew no! Matthew!!!! STO- " The basement was filled with the blood curdling screams of the swimmer as the iron burnt the word 我的 into his skin. And just like that... youngjae passed out once again, leaving his body to Matthew's disposal. He prayed for this to end. He prayed for someone to save him. He needed some god, any god, all gods to hear his prayers to let him come out of this hell. Because slowly but surely... he was going to give up and give in. And jaebum wouldn't be there to save him this time.

-------------------- authors note ----------------
我的 （wo de ） translates to my or mine. I used it to drop hints towards oncoming chapters.

Im extremely angry right now as there is a rant up on my main page about a comment that i had to delete.

So I apologize for having the comment up as long as i did. But please enjoy my stories!! They're all here for you to read and enjoy!