Life Of Dreams

Epilogue

“Thank you Harold.  You and your firm have been very helpful.  Please just continue to watch and report back to me with any deviations.  At least for now.”  With a wave of his hand, he not only dismissed Harold, but the problem he had just helped alleviate.

 Harold had been standing in front of Manny Humphries’ large antique desk in an ‘at ease’ position.  The right side of his lip turned ever so slightly up; Harold’s version of a subtle smile.  I would like to smack that condescending bastard.  Rich people and their problems make me feel the need of a hot shower and a stiff drink.  But the messier the problem, the richer they make me.

 “Yes sir, you will get a complete report by the end of each week.”  With a curt nod toward the half reclining figure on the deep blood-red leather sofa, Harold turned and left the room, closing the door behind him.

The figure turned his head toward Manny.  “Do you think that’s really necessary?  It’s over.”

 Manny’s jaw clenched and the veins in his temples stood out.  “It’s over when I know it’s over and say it’s over.  Right now you’re walking a fine line.  One step on either side of that line and I’ll throw you to the dogs.

 “Let’s get this absolutely straight.  I took you on, solely on the behalf of Gwen and her pleading.  You had already gone through half the agents in Hollywood and the other half wouldn’t touch you.  But I thought I saw a chance for you to get back on top.  So I thought I’d take that gamble if it meant so much to her.”

 “You don’t have to remind me, I know the entire story.  I lived it, remember?”  Trent got up and walked over to the window.  A beautiful view of the LA city.  Manny’s office spoke of how rich and powerful he was.  Not many agents could afford to occupy the entire top floor of a prestigious downtown building.  But then, not everyone represented such stars as Gwendolyn Stevens. 

 “Yes, I think I do have to remind you.  When Gwen came to me and said she was marrying you, I told her she was a fool.  She was barely twenty five years old and you were fifteen years her senior.  She was on the rise, and you were heading towards the bottom.  But she married you anyway.  She stood by you and so did I.  While you wasted your money and your talents snorting coke, Gwen was out there working, making quite a name for herself.  I’m the one that got you into that quiet rehab center to detoxify your body.”

 Trent glared at Manny.  Why bring this all up again?  It’s over.  But he just stood there and took it.

 “I got you some roles after that.  Not major ones, but it kept you working.  I had to grovel to get you even those.  You realized that, didn’t you?  Didn’t you?”  Manny was demanding an answer.

Trent just nodded in agreement.

 “Then you continued your self-destructive mode with drinking until I almost had to carry you to the shoots myself.  I babysat you whenever Gwen was called out on location, just to make sure you didn’t drink yourself to death.  And when we both had had it, we took your sorry ass up into the mountains to a ‘retreat’ until you had dried yourself out.”  Manny was talking in a gentle, controlled voice which made it sound more lethal than if he had been screaming. 

The two men stood staring angrily at each other.  One tall, broad-shouldered with a narrow trim waist that was evidence to his recent conversion to healthy food and exercise.  The other was a small broad man with energy radiating from his body, even as he stood there without moving.  It was difficult to realize that the former was a good ten years older than the latter.    

“And now this.  I should have washed my hands of you the minute you called telling me of that lady’s accident and afraid that if she didn’t come to, that someone might find something connecting you to her.  Gwen or no Gwen, I should have left you dangling and made you clean up your own mess.  It took Harold and his guys just a few minutes to find out you had been registered under Vance Christian at that little hideaway.  Not exactly a far cry from Chris Van Cert, the vampire killer, from that ‘direct to CD’ first film you made.  What the hell were you thinking?      

“If this affair had come to light, Gwen would have been devastated and not at all forgiving.  She would have taken just about anything from you, but not betrayal.  You are one fuckin’ lucky dude … I take that back, the only luck you have is because of me.  I’m the one that knew who to hire to wipe away all the evidence so you wouldn’t get caught. 

“And don’t pat me on the back as some guardian angel, I have my own stake in this.  I had that Spielberg part all wrapped up and just waiting for signatures.  If this had come out in the open, that would have been down the drain, and part of my reputation with it.  This role isn’t the lead, but it’s a great part, and could be the one that gets you back in the big time.  It could even be an Oscar contender.”

 “Manny, I owe you over and above whatever you get paid.  I know that, and believe me I’ve appreciated all the help you’ve given me.”  Trent was now resigned and subdued.  He knew his entire career could have blown up in his face.  No one would want anything to do with the person who hurt America’s sweetheart.

 “You don’t get off that easy, because I now own you.  Get that straight.  Keep off the crap, the booze and kiss the ground that Gwen walks on.  Get back to doing what you used to be great at doing, and that’s acting.  That’s what I’ll get from you from now on.  Nothing less.  You’re expected on location next week and you won’t give anyone any trouble, got it?”  Then Manny spat out  “You’re still an actor, aren’t you?”              

“Yeah, sure, right.”  Trent walked back to the couch and sat.  He laid his head back against the cool leather and crossed his arms above his forehead. 

How the hell did I get myself into this mess? 

I should never have stayed after everyone else had left after that lunch.  But there was something in Carolyn that drew me to her; an innocence, a sadness, an emptiness.  That was it, an emptiness; a void that I felt I needed to fill.  She was a fan, but my stardom really didn’t seem to phase her, she had a quiet, serious air about her.  We talked for so long, yet the time just flew by.  It had been quite a while since anyone really wanted to know me and it felt good.  I’ve loved Gwen, and still love her now, but she’s been more of a keeper than my wife … and that’s been my fault. 

 How the hell did I screw this up so badly?           

Behind his closed eyes he saw the scene he had played out time and again within the past month or so.  He saw Carolyn’s eyes as they met his.  The pain and confusion mixed with the fear she felt was displayed there vividly.  He could even pinpoint the second she wrongly concluded that he had never known her, never touched her, never loved her. 

 And that cruel, but necessary gesture of signing a picture for her as though she were any other fan.  How could he ever get rid of the image of her face at that moment?  Cool, calm and completely detached he was, even when Carolyn crumbled to the ground.  All the while his heart had been beating wildly.  He wanted to touch her, hold her, tell her she deserved someone better, tell her he was one miserable, weak son-of-a-bitch. 

Am I still an actor? 

I’m the best damn actor who ever lived.