Midnight lovestory

On the other side

Now

"My holy Father. I am in your hands completely. Bared, humble, vulnerable. Please, my Lord, please guide me in this rough time. Things are.. happening. Things I don't want to understand. Things that scare me to death. I know this is not what you have planned for me. But Lord - give me strength! Give me strength to beat this unworthy, unchristian beast from my heart! I beg of you, God, in a time of need - please, please help me back on the right path! Please, God, please don't abandon me with this!"

A desperate man's cries are heard through the dark, empty house. His voice's breaking the eerie silence. Desperate and lost is he, but mostly deserted for he has no one but his Almighty Father to ask for help with this. Neither his family nor his church can help him. He is all by himself.

Prior

The young man's paying close to none attention on the couple in front of him and he's not even entirely sure *what* the conversation's about; they ask all the common questions and he answers on autopilot. The reason for his mindless state is the same reason for the cold sweat on his back. It's first when he hears the woman say the most dreadful sentence that his ears finally listen in, "Felix should be the first one to meet with you. He's the easiest of us to schedule with". Great. Just great. The young man smiles brightly and looks in his calendar; he subconsciously picks a day that's already filled to the rim with meetings and appointments, unknown to himself as a way to drown out the meeting. The two men, one in front of the other with only a desk separating them, agrees on a day and time and the slightly older man catches the younger man's eyes when he say, "Thank you", and that carefree smile and those uninvited inviting eyes freeze his stomach. The young man doesn't like those kind of eyes, he never has, and maybe/maybe not does he know why that is or maybe/maybe not is he refusing to acknowledge the reason why men with those kind of eyes freaks him out. Once again, he's trapped in his mind and he's a little baffled when the woman suddenly (suddenly to his mindless mind) rises and leaves with a cold smile. Did he do something? Say something maybe? He exchanges "See you Tuesday"s with the older man and he's left with a weird, uncomfortable feeling in his stomach; a feeling annoyingly close to exhaustion.

The days pass in a flash and his mind is (as subconsciously desired) drowned in work and he's therefore taken by surprise when a soft knock lands on the office door. "Come in", it's more like a question than a request, and then the cold sweat's back. The older man smiles, apologetically, before he makes himself comfortable in the chair on the other side of the desk, opposite of the younger man whose mind's yet again all over the place but fortunately also yet again on autopilot. They talk, more freely this time around, and the younger man gets to know the man in front of him better, gets to know what to say in front of their families and friends and what not to say. Though, the lack of eye contact still remains the same. The younger man writes down something particularly interesting when the sound of a yawn breaks the otherwise silence. He looks up and realizes that the older man looks tired, burnt out, and something deep inside of him (though, he's never going to admit to it) sparks a new feeling. "Let's stop here for today. You look like you've had a long day at work", he says and offers a smile directly from his heart; he means it, he should go home, sleep, his health's more important. But when the other man declines the offer (or was it a kind-hearted command?) he actually lies; in his profession, one really shouldn't lie, but it seems like the right thing to do, like it's better to lie than to keep the man here and let him get even more tired. "Don't worry, I know more about you in this first meeting than I normally know in two meetings", but a lie should always be followed by a truth, he knows that much at least, "You're very easy to get to talking. And I mean than in the kindest way possible!" The smile the truth draws out of the older man easily erases the white lie that spilled from his lips, "I think it's just that you're easy to talk to. The words kind of float on their own, I think". And the younger man's stomach's suddenly very, very cold; but in a totally new way of 'cold' than he's used to and it's a little scary but also a little warming, in some weird way. Suddenly the older man's eyes get a closed off look to them and before the younger man knows it, he older man's out the door in the same manner the woman was just a few days earlier. And once again, the younger man's left to wonder what he did wrong.