i miss the mountains
i really miss the mountains
i hate looking everywhere, head snapping back and forth,
chest heaving, running past the trees,
just trying to find the mountains,
even though i know they're not there,
they're not there
they're not there hugging the horizon
they're not there watching over you, they're not there watching over anything
as if too many people forgot about them
so all they could do is crumble
as if i wasn't enough to hold them up, as if they forgot about me
so they just crumbled away into the dust particles you see floating in the sunlight
just disappeared
...do you know how it feels to be looking at the mountains
the ones you've walked through, the ones you see every morning through the small kitchen window
the ones that make you feel safe when you wake up in the middle of the night,
still there, protecting you...
and then the plane pulls away and you close your eyes, and then they're gone
you come back here, and you just know something is missing.
everything is flat, the way it was before.
flat in so many senses.
where did they go?
i think about them all the time
I picture the dust falling through my fingers
but it was me who left...
maybe it was me who crumbled.
