kicking and screaming// 5sos

Three

*trigger warning. When you see !!!!!WARNING!!!!! Read at your own risk.*

After i was finished in the bathroom, i slowly made my way downstairs. Slowly cause my stomach is bruising really bad.

I went into the loungeroom and Ash was the only one there. "Ash?" I said so quiely im positive he didnt notice but he did.

"Yeah Carmen" he answered just looking and the floor with his arms on his knees. "Where is everyone?" I asked as i walked over and sat next to him.

"I uh i asked them to go out so i could talk to you. Is that okay?" At this point i was scared. Scared for what was to come. "Um yeah sure" i nervously pulled the sleeves of his shirt into sweater paws and started chewing on my lip.

Ashton sighed and rubbed his hands through his hair then all over his face. "What has happened since ive been gone?" Okay that isnt too bad, i guess.

"I dont really know. We all kind of lost a piece of us when you left. Me more then others." I mumbled the last part. "What do you mean?"

"I-i dont realy know i just became sad all the time and felt lonely even though i had Mum, Lauren and Harry. They just never seemed to cheer me up"

"But why? You used to love life and even if you were upset there was still a spark of sunshine inside you." He turned to look at me. His eyes were so sad.

"Yeah, well, people change Ash and i just so happened to go down a shitty road. Im going to bed." I fought to keep tears in as i walked upstairs into my room. When i closed and locked my door i got into bed and cried myself to sleep.

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Ashtons p.o.v:

Woah. Okay something is completely wrong with Carmen. I grabbed my phone out and called the first person who could at least help me a little.

"Hello?"

"Hey Nia"

"Oh! Hey Ash whats up. Havent spoken in a while"

"Yeah just been really busy with tour and stuff. But thats not why i called you"

"Yeah okay. How can i help?"

"Do you um know anything about what happened when i left?"

"Um all i know is that Carmen just shut herself down, like she stopped hanging out with me and everything. Why whats wrong?"

"I got home today and when Car came home she had three cuts on her face, the side of her nose was bruising and she was limping."

"Holy crap! You dont think-"

"That she's getting severely bullied?"

"Yeah i think so."

"Oh! Whilst i was hugging her she mumbled to me 'please dont leave me here'. Do you know what thats about?"

"No sorry, like i said before she distanced herself from me and i know nothing. Sorry Ash but i know just as much as you. I hope she gets better. Tell her i said hi and rena does too, bye!"

"Yeah bye" i said glumly after she hung up. Why would Carmen stop talking to her bestfriend? I sighed and rubbed my face. I should go for a shower and shave.

!!!!!WARNING!!!!!
!!!!!WARNING!!!!!
!!!!!WARNING!!!!!

After getting my clothes i went to the shower. As i was washing my body, i noticed something on the ground. My razor. But the was a missing blade. I froze, she can't, she wouldn't. I hurriedly turned off the shower and hopped out. All i was thinking, my baby sister cant go down the path i did, no way. I finished getting dressed and ran for Carmens door.

Pounding my fist on the door, i shouted her name repeatedly. "Carmen, Car baby its me, open the door. I wanna help. I love you, please open the door." I got no answer so I kept slamming my hands against her door.

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Carmens p.o.v:

I woke up from loud pounding on my door. To be honest it actually scared me. Next a voice came.

"Carmen, Car baby its me, open the door. I wanna help. I love you, please open the door" it was ashton. And why is he saying he wants to help me. What does he want to help me with?

I decided to go and calm my big brother down before he breaks my door down. I unlocked to door and slowly opened it, to see a half wet puffy Ashton? "Ash calm down and take deep breathes" I instructed as i pushed some of his hair off his forehead.

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Ashtons p.o.v:

She opened the door and told me something but all i could focus on was how she lifted her arm up and pushed my hair away. I would've thanked her for it but a bit of her sleeve fell down and i could se the familiar bandages hiding something i only hoped i would go through.

Before Carmen had enough time i grabbed her arm and pulled her into my room, locking the door incase Harry or Lauren walked in.

"What are you doing Ash?!" Carmen shouted. "Ow stop that hurts!" She shouted again. I let her go but sat her on my bed. Crouching down infront of my baby sister, i looked her dead in the eye.

"Show me your arms. Now" i said as stern as i could. I could tell that i got her cause her eyes widened and she held breath. "Now! Carmen." I really didnt want to yell but i need her to stop.

She gulped and bit her quivering lip and with teary eyes she put her arms out for me.

Pushing her sleevs up and unwrapping the bandages, I almost vomit and faint. My baby sister is struggling and struggling hard.

!!!!!!!!SAFE TO READ!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!SAFE TO READ!!!!!!!!!
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Carmens p.o.v:

I felt so ashamed. I had hid it so well and no its gone. All my hard work is gone.

I couldn't help myself, sobbing and pulling my hair, kicking and screaming, wishing for my life to get better. I just wanted to die. I never wanted to be born.

Ever since Ash went away i just went insane. I lost myself. My brother stole me and now that he's back i still feel nothing. Im gone. And nobody can save me, as i sit here, listening to my demons screaming at me, as i sit here sobbing and straining against Ashtons grip, as i sit here ready to end it all.