Silence Breaking

07. The Not So Silent Storm

I did it.

I kissed him.

I kissed Mr Rikkard Ambrose. And the moment my lips touched his, all the fantabulous advice Amy had given me about how to do it well, how to draw a man in, just flew right out of my mind. It felt like our very first time – like a first kiss was supposed to feel. Soft, and hesitant, and you still can't quite believe that this is happening, that he wants this as much as you do, but he does, and he's here with you, and he's kissing you, kissing you, kissing you until all the breath is gone from your lungs.

His arms wrapped around me like irons and he lowered himself down, pinning me to the mattress, answering my kiss in a silent shout of Yes! Yes! that roared out the window and echoed from the snow-clad hills. For a few precious, blissful moments, we weren't two people desperately searching for something, we were one, and we were warm inside.

Then, suddenly, his mouth was torn from mine. Panting, and blinking into the suddenly empty darkness above me, I was, for a moment, unable to move or even think.

'Why?' Rolling around, I saw Mr Ambrose at the utmost end of the bed, crouching like a predator, ready to spring. But...away from me, or towards me?

'Why? You really have to ask me that?' His eyes were in shadow, but I could see them glitter, see them burn. Fire and ice mixed together, each as deadly as the other. 'After what you just did? God! If you touch me one more time, I won't be able to stop myself!'

Slowly rising on my hands and feet, I scooted towards him. 'Who says you have to stop?'

That muscle in his jaw was beating a staccato rhythm. He was close to the edge. 'I do!'

I was almost there. Almost with him. 'Why? It's not as if we haven't done much more than this before.'

Suddenly, the cold mask of his face cracked, and through the gap, I could see the naked truth underneath. 'Yes! Yes, we have. But...'

But.

I knew exactly which 'but' he meant.

But that had been on another continent, a world away from England, with its rules, regulations and gossiping mouths. But that had been in wild exotic places, so far away, so very unreal.

This, on the other hand, was very real. As real as it could get. We were in the middle of civilisation, in a palatial mansion, surrounded by people who knew our names. We were in his parents' home, for heaven's sake! If we did this, was there a way back for us?

I didn't think so.

So there was only one thing to do.

I lunged forward. Grabbing a fistful of the hair at the back of his head, I pulled him towards me and kissed him. Kissed him hard. Kissed him until there was no tomorrow.

And he?

He kissed me back with ten times the force, a hundred times the need! Kissed me as if he lived for me instead of money. It was a nice thought to have, no matter how unlikely. When we finally broke apart and lay there, staring into each other's eyes, I didn't know what to say. But he did.

'My little ifrit...'

A grin spread across my face. 'Have my flaming wings impressed you?'

Reaching out, he stroked my cheek with the tips of his fingers. 'They have, nearly as much as the fire inside you.'

How could it be that here, in the cold and the dark, suddenly, poetry flowed from the lips of the master of silence?

Because he's never been silent for you, Lilly.