No Regrets

Part Two

I've got my issues, I admit that
You got some fears that hold you back
But we are acting like we're children
Looking to blame for what we lack

Before we lose everything we have tomorrow
Can we forget what went wrong yesterday,

No Regrets by MAGIC!

/

They'd been meeting up for runs every Saturday for the last two months. Jay had been pleasantly surprised when Erin had text him a few days after that first run to see if he was free to join her again.  Their route had gotten longer now, cutting though Central Park, as they pushed each other's limits and maybe tried to draw out the time they spend in each other's company. They teased and trash talked. Jay loved how Erin would push their pace faster when he told her she'd gone soft now that she was wearing those fancy pant suits everyday. She'd remind him between pants of exertion that she had little use for them since she worked more undercover now than ever and would tease him about how her federal pay cheque had afforded her the privilege of living in a loft, with not only a view but an actual bathroom, six blocks uptown from the little shoe box he called home.  After comments like that Jay couldn't help but push himself past his limits, his long legs eating up the pavement as he pulled away from her and beat her to the park exit. She'd swear and call him a show off and somehow manage to make him feel like he needed to pay for the smoothies they'd grab on the cool down walk back to her place.

Sometimes he'd say goodbye to her at the door to her building and continue down those six blocks to his own place, sometimes, the days he wasn't obligated to buy her drink, she'd invite him up for a smoothie instead and they'd talk shop and casually banter before one or other would make an excuse about having something to do. Being alone in a confined space with each other for too long made it hard to ignore the chemistry they still shared and eventually one of them would back away. Occasionally they'd extend the visit long enough to grab lunch together, Erin proving that whatever other changes she'd made in her life she still enjoyed a good combo.

He enjoyed spending time with her, and found himself looking forward to their Saturday morning ritual but, despite the open conversation they'd managed almost six months earlier when he'd turned up to say goodbye, they seemed to be dancing around their past.  And Erin, although she gave back as good as she got in the banter department, stopped short of the flirting that had characterized their early friendship in Chicago. Jay figured there was one of two reasons; either she was seeing someone and wasn't comfortable telling him, or she wasn't interested in rekindling their romance.

For his part Jay still wasn't sure what he wanted either. He'd dropped the occasional hint, making stupid jokes filled with sexual innuendo, to gage her interest, but he didn't know if he was ready yet. Moving to New York had definitely been a good move for him, his boss was already encouraging him to take the Sergeants exam and talking about all the doors that were open to him. But he couldn't seem to move past the light banter and talk to Erin openly about what he'd gone through and was still going through, something he was sure she'd need him to do if they had any chance of moving forward.

An opportunity to test the waters popped up thanks to Zack. His wife had to fly out of town when her mother had a stroke and Zack offered Jay their unused broadway tickets. It wasn't really his thing but he thought of Erin instantly, remembering how she'd enjoyed the odd time they'd taken in a show in Chicago.

She had hesitated briefly when he'd called to ask her on what he now thought of as their first date but she agreed. He figured it was all the proof he needed to rule out her being in any kind of steady relationship with someone else.

He brought her flowers, daisies, when he picked her up. He felt kind of stupid at the cliche gesture until she opened the door and a broad smile lit up her face.