#1 of THE E L I T E Series
"No one ever said being apart of a powerful group of rich people was easy,"
*Warning, this is triggering and does include self harm, read at your own risk*
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"You alright Katie?" my dad asked, leaning against my door frame. I nodded and continued to do some online shopping on my laptop, I wanted to amp up my wardrobe and make it look a little better. Impress my mother and grandmother, get them off my back for a bit.
"Yeah I'm fin-" I got cut off by my own burp, the aftertaste of the chocolate cake I had eaten that morning evoking bittersweet memories of what happened after I'd finished eaten it.
"Damn that was a good one," my dad chuckled before taking a seat on my bed, "Its only day one of our daddy daughter weekend and we haven't done anything. Yet. Just give me a good hour and meet me in the living room, I've got something planned for us," he grinned, before kissing the top of my head and leaving. I sighed and paid for my items before turning off my laptop. It had gotten the slightest bit hotter, so I settled on a plain white t shirt, some Adidas joggers and some trainers.
To kill time, I did everything but sit down and think. If I thought too much it got sad, and I didnt need that kind of stress anymore. My grandmother being here wasn't going to effect me anymore, she was old and irrelevant and was jealous that I'm doing a lot better in the modelling industry than she did in her whole life.
"Seriously?" think of the devil.
"What now?"
"Excuse me?"
I'd had enough, "Get out. Just go, you're honestly so jarring," I scoffed and walked towards her to escort her out of my room.
"How dare you speak to me like that? Have you no respect?" she frowned.
I shook my head, "Nope. And neither do you. Buh-Bye," I closed the door behind her and brushed myself off, taking a seat on the edge of my bed.
I couldn't believe what I'd just done.
I fucking stood up for myself. Like a.... a warrior.
Ok, maybe not like a warrior but you get what I mean.
I sighed and checked the time, it was only a matter of time before I was needed downstairs, so I headed down there and found my dad holding two shot guns.
Right on cue I guess.
"Guns?" I raised a brow.
"We're going to go shoot some shit," my dad smirked.
*** I frowned as soon as we stopped riding our horses and found plates with words written on them in the middle of the forest.
"What does it say?" I asked my dad as I got off Bailey and walked towards the plate, choking on my spit.
"I went and found some negative comments that have been said, or ones that your therapist told me you think of yourself and put them on these plates," he explained, handing me a gun, "you're shooting them. Because they don't effect you, because you have the ability to make them disappear. Because you're strong,"
I felt a tear roll down my cheek, "I'm pretty sure I'm too young to be handling a firearm,"
"Yet you know how to," he smirked, "I won't tell anyone don't worry. Just do your thing," he took a step back as I placed the ear buds into my ears and walked away from the plates, aiming my gun at the first one.
'Ugly'
Bang.
'Worthless'
Bang.
'Murderer'
Bang.
'Biggest slut'
Bang.
'Fat'
I paused and missed the shot on purpose, not missing the look in my father's eye.
'Not worthy enough to be a Darlington'
I missed.
'Attention seeker'
I missed.
'You deserve it all'
I missed.
'Kill yourself'
I put the gun down and handed it to my dad, getting back onto Bailey.
"Katie I was trying to help, I thought-"
"Dad I understand," I gave him a fake smile, "you're doing your best and this has helped me. A lot. But I need some time alone please," I whispered before turning Bailey around and riding towards a small cliff 10 minutes away from the woods and 20 minutes away from the house.
I felt like I was in a country movie, running away from my mum who just told me I can't compete in the annual barn dance contest and I just spent three months practicing a dance routine with my horse.
I bloody wish I was.
But I wasn't. I was in the saddest book/film anyone would have ever read or seen, my heart in a complete state and a never ending flow of tears streaming down my cheeks. I wiped them away with one hand before stopping Bailey and jumping off of her, walking towards the edge of the cliff.
And then I screamed.
I stood there and screamed for what seemed like hours, trying to get all the bottled up emotions out of me in a few screams but it didn't seem to work. "WHY WONT YOU LET ME BE HAPPY?!" I screamed, hitting my head over and over again, "HE WAS HELPING YOU! HE WANTS TO HELP THEY ALL DO!" I dropped to my knees and cried.
My whole life I was surrounded by people yet, I couldn't help but feel so lonely. I screamed again but no one could hear me. No one was there to save me from myself. And then I realised something. It's me. And only me. Nobody else.
And then I cried again.
How bloody weak.
*** Thank you so much for reading!
The next chapter is a BIG and very important chapter in this book. I don't know if it'll be long or short but it's extremely significant either way.
