patient love ||h.s&l.t au||

Hi

Louis is plagued by the never-ending set of pictures that flash beneath his eyelids.

At least it had gotten somewhat better with time. He remembers the time when the images were too strong that they were all he could see.

Couldn't process what was happening around him, trapped in the terrifying moments of that night.

The night that had haunted his nightmares and every waking thought. He couldn't escape it, he couldn't say that it was just a dream. Because it did happen and it was painfully obvious when he woke up from his night terrors to find the other side of the bed empty.

Tracing the outline that should be there, but had vanished a couple months prior, louis tried to sort through his emotions. He was excited, so excited and elated. 6 months had never seemed so long.

6 months without the touch of the one he craved the most. 6 months without seeing the man he loved. This was the day he would be released.

So why was there a frown of his face?

Why were these negative feelings creeping into his happiness and morphing it into a great mass of anxiety?

He tried to push these thoughts away and got up to take a shower. Of course that had the opposite affect. He cursed himself when his mind started straying again, under the stream of water.

He was scared okay? He admitted it. Not only was he scared he was utterly terrified. Shutting off the shower with a bit more force than intended, he got out and caught his reflection in the mirror. He glared at himself.

Pathetic.

Was he terrified of harry? Of course not.

He was scared of the what if's.

What if it happened again? What if he couldn't save him this time? What if his feelings had changed? What if he didn't love harry anymore? What if harry didn't love him anymore?

Louis closed his eyes and tried to erase the painful thoughts. He couldn't afford to think like that, harry was his everything. He had done everything to keep harry alive.

You didn't do very well did you? His subconscious sneered at him.

He winced and walked back into their room. Throwing on clothes that had been on a pile on the floor. They were still clean, he hoped. He sat on the bed and was once again consumed by his thoughts.

He hadn't heard from harry in six months. At first he thought that Harry wasn't allowed to contact anyone. but Anne had called him during the first month and she was shocked that he hadn't received anything. She apparently had been getting weekly letters and the odd phone call.

So everyday after work louis would check his mailbox hoping to see Harry's writing on a single envelope.

He stopped checking after month two.

He stopped answering Anne's calls around that time too. It's not that he didn't like Harry's mum, but all she did was talk about her visits with harry. Louis was confused, hurt and jealous.

So he did what he did best, hide.

The only time he would go out was to work and then straight home. Maybe the odd trip to get groceries, though that had been rare lately. In their own home he could pretend that harry would walk through the door. Or he could ignore the sad stares and purifying words that everyone addressed him with.

Around month three it turned into anything that reminded him of harry hurt.

He had tried to drink away the memories and he had managed to get pretty plastered. It was all golden until he realized the wine he had been drinking was Harry's favourite. He doesn't know if him puking that night was intentional or not, it was still hazy.

He had stopped all drinking after that.

Everyone had been concerned about Harry's progress that louis effortlessly slipped in the background. He was content in his solidarity. The only person he needed he couldn't be with so he waited alone. He counted down the days, the reminder on his phone lighting up each morning, a number less.

Glancing at the clock he realized it was nearly time. Moving before he could stop himself, louis got to his car and drove. He shut off the radio, not needing another distraction, and made his way to the address he memorized months prior.

The building he pulled up to was huge and intimidating. Were those Harry's first thoughts when he got there too? Was he as scared then as louis was now?

With shaky hands he turned off the car and just sat there for a moment. This was it. He opened the door and left the sanctuary of his car.

Entering the automatic doors of the centre louis tried to keep from fidgeting. He was instructed by the receptionist to take a seat. So he sat in the uncomfortable plastic chair and waited some more.

His head shot up when he heard a familiar laugh echo down the hall. He hadn't heard that sound in so long and his heart ached to hear it again. His mind was running over a single thought:

harry, harry, harry, harry

That's when he saw him. Mid-laugh harry walked through the doors and froze when he caught louis gaze.

Louis mind went blank and Harry's face flickered in disbelief.

It only lasted a moment before the biggest grin broke over his face. Louis felt his face do the same. Before his brain could catch up he was already standing and running over to harry.

Throwing himself into Harry's arms he clung on tight. Harry's arms wound around the smaller boy and buried his face in louis neck.

Both boys took a moment to breath, feeling complete once again.

Louis loosened his hold a bit so he could look up into the eyes his memory didn't give credit to. But it was harry who spoke first.

"You waited for me" harry whispered incredulously, his eyes filled with tears.

"I'll always wait for you" louis said blinking away his own tears.

Harry had heard the conviction in his tone. He leaned down, pressing his lips to louis'.

A sigh escaped louis, six months seemed like nothing anymore,

this was their happily ever after.

The end

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Happy endings for everyone