Falling for You // Matt Healy

She Way Out

"With a face from a movie scene
Or magazine, you know what I mean
She's definitely got the style on you
She's definitely got the style on you

She's got two-tone everything
Moving but she just can't move
She's got two phones, everything, you
Moving but she just can't move"

-•-

Matty's POV

She had a boyfriend?

I walked down the sidewalks of New York, smoking a cigarette. The cold was biting at my cheeks but I hardly felt it.

I took the receipt out and scanned over it.

Jackie
555-1028

It couldn't hurt calling her up. Anything to get thoughts of Fiel out of my head.

She was beautiful. She was genuine. She had real interests and I craved her.

She had the face of a beautiful model but her heart was twice as gorgeous. I could tell she had issues though. I could see straight through her lies even if she thought they were good.

She had got me, and got me good.
Even Gemma hadn't made me fall that fast. I had loved Gemma with all my heart and I wanted to make her my wife but she threw it all down the drain.

I was standing on the edge of a cliff and God knew I was ready to jump.

I would do anything to rid myself of this feeling. I dialed the number of Jackie, the girl who seemed to have one layer and be a self entitled brat. But hey, I needed some way to get these feelings out of my system.

"Hello?"

"Hi, Jackie? It's Matty, from the coffee shop. Do want to come over to my flat later?"

Fiel's POV

I made my way back to the building I worked in.

I mulled over the events that had happened.

What would Ben think when he found out that I'd been hanging out with some random bloke who, nonetheless, was in a band?

I cringed. He would be furious. Ben had never hit me but he'd come close a few times due to my going out. I was going to have to face him eventually and I figured this time he'd break and I was scared.

I made it back to my desk and was mindlessly flicking through previous articles; my brain didn't feel like functioning at the moment. I knew that if I started thinking that things would go downhill again.

"Fiel?"

I snapped out of my daze to see Gabriel, one of our chief photographers practically waving his camera in front of my face.

"Oh, sorry Gabriel. Is it already 3:00?"

"Yea, they need you on floor 3."

"Of course." I shuffled my papers and grabbed a pad and pen to take notes.

Today was going to be a long day.

--

I was visiting Ben at his flat because he wanted to have a dinner date; at home of course.
He always claimed that any man who ever set eyes on me looked me up and down. He would either claim that I "was too perfect to be seen by others" or "have you fucked him too?"

It depended on his mood.

I'd bought a bottle of wine and was prepared to be drunk by the end of the night. I knew that when I told Ben about Matty he'd would want to "show me whose I was" and have sex and frankly, I couldn't do that sober.

I knocked on the door and a few moments later he opened the door.

"Hey, baby," he kissed my forehead and let me into the apartment. I cringed at the pet name.

"I made us steak, but I figured you wouldn't want to eat so there's a salad."

"Thanks."

He walked over to the counter and began to open the bottle of wine and grabbed glasses.

"So how was your day?" he asked.
It seemed like a totally normal question but I knew it held hidden meaning.

What he really meant was either:
A. What were you doing all day?
Or
B. Who did you talk to today?

I tried to approach this question with caution and think of way to not anger him but I knew he would be angry.

"Well, I saw my friend today and we went out to lunch..."

"Oh, Brixton?"

"No... Matty..."

"Hmm, I didn't know you had a friend named Madison."

I could see him trying to process the information. I gulped before continuing.

"Actually his name is Matt. Just everyone calls him Matty."

I saw his hand tighten around the bottle and his knuckles turned white. I saw the muscles underneath his shirt tighten and I braced myself.

"Him?" he said through harshly gritted teeth.

"Yea, he's an extended friend of Bri's."

His breathing became increasingly more rapid and deep.

"Fiel. What have I said about hanging out with guys?"

"Ben it's okay. He's just a friend. Only a friend, babe," I touched his should and he flinched.

It all happened in an instant. The next thing I knew the bottle of wine was broken on the floor and so was I.

I felt a harsh stinging on my right cheek and my head buzzed. I felt shards of glass in my palm but none of that hurt as much as my face or the fact that my boyfriend had just hit me.

The next moment I was yanked up by my elbow and dragged by Ben.

"You're mine. No one else's. I don't want you even talking to this "Matty." I don't want you fucking another guy." He whispered harshly into my ear.

I hadn't even had anything to drink and what happened next would not be something I would or could forget.

--

I woke up sore and confused.

The memories came rushing back to me and I broke down. I sat with my knees to my naked chest and sobbed my heart out.

My head ached and my face throbbed.

Ben was not in the bed and I didn't think he was in the house either. I tried to collect myself but continued to sob as I picked up my clothing scattered around the bedroom. I put my hair in a pony tail and when I looked in the mirror I almost had a heart attack.

A dark purple and red bruise covered my eye and most of my right cheek.

I could hardly breath I was crying so hard and I didn't even have any medication with me.

I pulled on the dress I was wearing last night and grabbed my purse before practically sprinting out of the flat.

Wow, you're such a failure!

Why can't you do anything right?

You mess everything up!

I whimpered and weakly hit the side of my head.

"Please, just stop."

I somehow managed to make it to my flat without crashing and I crawled into my bed after taking at least five pills and tried to find the calm in the storm that was my brain.

----------------------<3---------------------