Falling for You // Matt Healy

Settle Down

"But you're losing your words
We're speaking in bodies
Avoiding me and talking 'bout you.
But you're losing your turn
I guess I'll never learn
'Cause I stay another hour or two."

-•-

Fiel's POV

We were walking around the busiest streets in New York.

Matty grabbed my hand and intertwined out fingers. He had a quirk about playing with my fingers that I had absolutely fallen in love with.

"Okay, this one's lame but favorite color," he asked.

We were playing 20 questions basically just trying to learn more about one another.

I learned that one of his favorite things was to look out at the crowd and know that they were all there just to see him. He said he could never fully fathom that.

I learned that he loved rainy or windy days in New York because they reminded him of Manchester and the times he had spent with his family- before his parents got a divorce.

And I learned that Matty hated shoes and hated the fact that because it was a big city with bile and broken glass on almost every cement block he had to wear them.

"Mmmmm, I like grey. But not just grey. Like the color the sky changes just before it rains..."

He hummed in approval.

"My turn. What's your favorite song to perform on stage?"

"I like to sing Me. It's such a beautiful song and it just makes me take a step back and evaluate the position I've been put in and it makes me feel humble. I also like to perform Is There Somebody Who Can Watch You. I wrote that about my brother. We don't talk often enough."

"I'm sorry you can't talk to your brother as often as you'd like. But I know he appreciates you Matty. Don't beat yourself up about it."

"God, you're amazing."
He kissed the side of my head and pulled me in closer, put his arm around my shoulder.

"What's your biggest fear?" he asked. I knew that he was cautious about asking this question but he had every right to know.

"I'm afraid one day everyone will just leave and forget about me. I'm scared that they'll all just be gone and I never got to say goodbye or tell them I loved them. I guess it's my biggest fear because it's happened once before," I mumbled the last bit.

"Don't fret over it now. You can tell me back at the flat, okay?" he kissed my forehead again.
"For now, I'm freezing my arse off. Let's get a coffee."

We went to a small coffee shop called "Crazy Beans" or some shit name and Matty ordered me a mocha, knowing it was my favorite.

"What's your favorite coffee drink?" I asked him.

"I like latte's. I don't really like chocolatey drinks."

"For God's sake Matty you guys have a song called Chocolate!" I proclaimed.

"Oh, shut it," he laughed.
We exited the shop, hand in hand again.

"Are you ready to go back, love?" He asked.

I nodded.
Boy, I was going to miss this. I had to go back to work soon which meant less time with Matty and more time stressing over articles that needed correct punctuation. I sighed deeply and held on to his hand tighter.

--

We made it back to Matty's flat and my legs felt like dead weight.

"So when you said your worst fear had come true?" he started. I knew that this conversation would have come sooner or later and I prepared myself for it.