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Welcome to my 'story' I was bored so I was like "Hey, why not write something?" Judging from my recent books that I never finish or give a crap at all I noticed that it takes mind power to come up with description about every-fucking-thing, I mean my mind was super exhausted just from writing one chapter! Now that's talent. But I never have any talent, the only talent I have is that I can sing- or not. I don't know my mind is a messy thing. Oh let me tell you how eff'd up my mind is because there's one time that I sent a text message to my brother saying psychopathic things like imagining me suffocating someone with a plastic bag over their head and die! Or just the feeling of the knife going in their skin and their blood dripping out. What a fun imagination, but knowing me I won't hurt a fly (that's a figure of speech look it up) [or is it?].

I consider myself a walking disaster because I am a walking disaster! I am a clumsy mother fucker!-- not that I am thinking to fuck your mom clumsily cause that is just awkward... (I might be bi, but I don't know yet)

So, this are the list of things that I know about myself:

1. I talk to myself like I am acting like a scene or something. For example, I think of a situation and I come up with characters (all the characters are voiced by me) and I honestly love doing that... Just doing a movie with myself but I'm the audience! Isn't that wonderful?

2. I am a hypochondriac - I always believe that my illness will be much much worse even though it isn't. Like, there's one day that my neck was hurting and I thought I thought it's something serious about my spine, because girl if you saw my neck? It's eff'd up there's like a hump that I can't explain!! Idk I'll die soon.

3. I am afraid of dead bodies or its also known as necrophobia, I don't know how I got this phobia, but god damn I hate looking at dead bodies even the ones that I love who passed away before I just can't look at them!! Even if they force you to look at it (because it's disrespectful if you didn't look at it or visit the person who pass away) BITCH!! I don't want to cause I'm scared!!! Leave me be!

(I re-read this part, I know you will be saying... Oh she likes killing live people in her imagination but she's also afraid of dead bodies?? Well... Idk I need to talk to someone about this.)

4. I think I'm a psychopath - I saw a youtube video called 'are you a psychopath' / 'how do you know if someone is a psychopath' idk. The one who made it is psych2go she's really good. So after I watch the video, I relate to it 96% of the things she enumerated, so I suddenly believed that I am a psychopath.

5. I love taking mental health test, honestly, it's fun, it's not a REAL diagnosis or anything but I really really like to know that I have mental health. Again, I believe that I have one...or twice? Or thrice?? I don't know I need to consult a psychiatrist.

6. I'm kind of a narcissistic person or a conceited person. If you don't know what two of those words mean, here's the lazy meaning:
Conceited : Vein
Narcissist: the one whose obsessed with him/herself (I asked my sister on that one)

I don't know if I think myself of a bad person, but I think I am. Half of my brain says "you're not hurting anyone" and the other brain says "you skank"

I don't know but that's who I am.

I don't know but that's who I am

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