Universe of Uncertainty

1: COMEBACK

McLauren's POV

I harshly pressed the period button of my keyboard, I finished one chapter of my story again. I peeked at my wristwatch "6:32 am". I took a deep breath and sipped the cup of coffee my assistant just gave me. I headed to my room to take a quick nap before I attend my first class for this day. 

I laid my back on the soft sheets of my bed, pulled my blanket and closed my eyes.

It's been three years and my heart still has its own voids of guilt, I think I cannot fill them anymore. Memories that happened five years ago flooded me, again. This is my nightmare.

"Stop pushing me away, Mack! I've been wanting to be with you! I longed for this! I wanted this! Even if this means that I'll lose everything, even if this means that I'll need to stop writing. I ain't backing down on you, Mack. Please do the same. I love you" it was him. My first boyfriend. Mirko Giovanni Xavier.

"Begging someone to stay with you is not love, it is pure stupidity. Mirko, let's stop here. Pagod na ako." I know, I can hear myself, hurting him, hurting a friend. This is painful for me, but I need to rip his wound open and deeper, for it will be easier to heal. "I fell out of love. Mirko, I don't feel sorry. Go, pursue your dreams. Alam ko gusto mong gawin yon. So please, stop considering me in your plans. This is the dead end for us."

"Tignan mo ako sa mata at sabihin mo yan" matigas niyang sabi. He knows that looking into someone's eyes is my weakness.

Unti unti kong siyang tinignan sa mata, "Hindi. Na. Kita. Kailangan" and there tuloy tuloy ng umagos ang mga luha mula sa kanyang mga mata. Iyong mahigpit na pagkakahawak niya sa kamay ko unti unti ng kumakalas. Na parang nanghihina siya. His feet is slowly moving, hanggang sa nakatalikod na siya. Ang pagyugyog ng kanyang balikat ang tanging senyales ng kanyang hindi matapos tapos na pag-iyak. God knows how I badly want to hug and console him pero hindi ko magawa.

Bumalik ako sa reyalidad dahil kumatok sa pintuan ko si Gabriella, ang aking assistant, "Mack, nakahanda na mga gamit mo" ani nito na siyang sinagutan ko na lamang ng pagtango.

Bumangon ako sa pagkakahiga at chineck ang cellphone ko. 6:55 am, tatawagan ko sana sina Mama kaso naalala ko na tanghali pa lang sa kanila at baka busy pa sa trabaho ang mga iyon.

Nasa South Korea ako ngayon, dito ako nagtatrabaho. I work as an English Professor at Hoolim University, I only got 3 loads at sa umaga lang ang mga iyon. I am also a writer here, pinasok ako ng dating publishing company na pinagtatrabahuan ko sa Pilipinas dito.

It was my long time dream to work here. Dali dali kong inayos ang sarili ko at lumabas na ng kwarto. I'll eat my breakfast very quick. Oo lahat ng ginagawa ko pangmadalian na lang.

"Gabby, anong schedule ko ngayon?" tanong ko kay Gabriella, she's my assistant and a friend of mine. She's also a pure Filipino, 24 years old so basically mas bata siya ng 1 year sa akin.

"From 8 am to 12 pm. yun ang campus hours mo. And then at 2 pm may meeting ang Ainsoft. After that wala na, you can head back here na para naman makapagpahinga na kayo" sagot niya. Tumango tango naman ako at tinignan ang relo ko. 7:20 am.

"Una na ako, Gab. Tell CEO Jang na aattend ako sa meeting. I'll see you there" paalam ko sa kanya at umalis na sa bahay.

Khaos and Ten are also with me, Khaos is a prominent photographer and blogger. Minsan sa mga films at drama, siya ang incharge sa cinematography. She works at Golden Bear Arts and Photography, under din siya sa Ainsoft kaso ang focus is sa paintings at photography.