Over the next month Negan and Sky had set about clearing and raiding more houses, hitting a few at a time, going on runs once or twice a week. Negan had insisted they take it slow, saying he didn't want to put too much strain on her or the babies. But the truth was he was still worried about her after the general store raid went so horribly wrong.
He had tried to get her to talk about it, but she was shutting him out, insisting that she was fine, but Negan knew better. It's not like she had been distant, their relationship was as good as ever, but he knew there was something she wasn't telling him.
Sky was around twenty seven weeks pregnant at this point and she was only getting bigger and more uncomfortable carrying the twins, but she was determined she could handle it. "Babe I know you're worried about us" she said as she rubbed her belly.
"But I promise, I'm fine, I feel great and the babies are fine. We need to finish clearing the rest of the houses" Sky told him. They had swept about half of the small community and she was determined to finish the job before the twins arrived. Thankfully they had only come across walkers in their travels so far, no more run ins with people.
"Darlin… I know physically you are fine" Negan said. "Damn fine in fact" he added with a cheeky grin. "But I'm not talking about the physical shit".
"What are you saying?"
"I know you're not okay Sky. I know you haven't been okay since the store. What I don't get is why you think you need to hide that from me"
"Negan, I told you. Everything is fine. I'm over it" she insisted.
"Are you sure about that?" Negan pressed.
"Positive"
"So why are you having nightmares again?" he asked seriously and she stared at him like a deer caught in headlights. She thought he hadn't known, he hadn't woken her from any. He could see the thoughts rolling around in her head, trying to work out how he knew.
"Darlin' I'm a light sleeper. I hear you whimpering and crying out in your sleep, and every time I hold you tight and tell you you're safe until you calm down again. I don't wake you because I don't want to make a big deal about it.
I figured you'd talk to me when you were ready, but you haven't said a word for weeks now. And when I ask if you're okay, you just brush it aside like there's fucking nothing wrong and I know it's not true. Talk to me Darlin'… please" he begged.
"I don't know what you want me to say Negan"
"I don't care what you say Darlin', just don't lie to me and tell me that you're fucking fine, because I know that's bullshit" he pressed, trying not to let the anger and frustration be heard in his voice.
He wasn't angry at her, he could never be angry with Sky. He was angry about what happened to her, angry that it seemed to have broken her again. He felt helpless, all he wanted to do was make her pain go away.
"Ok… I'm not fine" she said in surrender.
"Talk to me"
"What happened… yes it messed me up for a bit, but we worked through it together and I made peace with it all. It's not what happened to me that's haunting me"
"So why the nightmares Sweetheart?" he asked as he pulled her into his arms.
"It's you Negan… it's always you"
"What do you mean Darlin'?"
"My nightmares are of losing you. Ever since that day when they had a gun to your head, making you watch… all I see when I close my eyes at night is them pulling the trigger. Losing you is what is scaring the shit out of me and I don't know how to deal with that" she confessed. "I can't do this by myself" she said as she rubbed her bump.
