Feminine Wreck

Chapter 4 - Judgement

A /N: ~

          Okay so I'll admit I lied a bit on the last chap - it wasn't exactly any longer than number two so yeah...sorry about that;P hope you're all doing alright and enjoying this so far!!♥ ~ Pyro.-.

P.S. I am sorry for the late update, i have been suffering with writers block through most of this section/:

I was awoken by the faint humming sound of the alarm on another dark morning. The sky was still a very dark shade of navy, and the moon was still faintly visible above the clouds.

My alarm read 5:50, time to get up. Time for school.

It felt like the whole world was spinning around me, and I felt the nausea beginning to swell up in my stomach.

Swallowing my fear I drag myself into the bathroom and start running the shower, I really didn't need school, not today.

I strip off the big, bulky purple sweater and examine my scars. They weren't looking too.... good?

Taking the rest of my clothes off I step into the shower and yelp in pain as the steaming hot water hits my wrist straight on. 'Don't be such a wimp' a voice whispers from somewhere in my head.

Heeding this advice I simply take the pain and get on with washing myself up.

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There was a loud, sudden thumping at the door. Wrapping my towel around my half naked body I step up and open it a crack, just for it to be pushed straight open by my father.

"Rise and shine!"

I glare at him and attempt to push his bulky body out of my room, but he remained still. "I'm up!" I groan angrily.

"Get dressed then! School today!" he replies excitedly elongating the school.

With one last clap he moves out onto the hallway, and I slam my door behind him. I am just lucky that he didn't catch a glimpse of my wrist!

After putting on a pair of black jeans, my panda sweater, and around ten rope bracelets, I pick up my brush and hairdryer. The hot air moved my long locks with such serenity, and it was dried in a matter of minutes.

Of course, the serenity didn't last as I just burst into tears as soon as I was done. I couldn't hold it in anymore, I needed to talk to someone.

But now the only someone I could ever rely on was gone, and I felt more alone than ever.

♥♥♡♡★★♡♡♥♥

I step up into the dark bus, it was still early as the sun was only just peeking through the many clouds littering the sky. The void above had turned a murky orange colour from the slight sunlight. It much fitted the atmosphere on the bus.

As I tread slowly forwards I hear whispers from the other students like "she's the one who's friend died" or "she looks awful". Even the bus driver gave me an anxious look-over.

Tears threatening to emerge from my eyes, I swiftly sit down near the back of the bus, and turn to the Window. I watch as we start moving, and appreciate the little bit of warmth the heaters above me were providing.

A while into the bus journey, it jolts to yet another stop. However, this time somebody sat directly next to me. There were many vacant seats, yet someone had sat on the adjoining seat beside me. The new arrival caused a new, welcoming sorce of heat from their body, so I didn't complain.

I try to ignore the person next to me, I didn't want to seem rude or intrusive by looking round so I continue to stare aimlessly out the Window, watching the shops and houses flutter by like paper in the wind.

"You can look at me, you know", a girl's voice suddenly whispers, presumably from the person next to me.

Turning, I see a beautiful girl who appeared to be around my age. Her light green eyes light up as I turn, and a beautiful smile emerges on her pink lips. "you don't think I would sit here for no reason?" she laughs, flipping her chocolate brown locks out of the way of her eyesight.

I just stare at her, I was lost for words. Since when do people come up to the lower of the school for a chat? Anyway, I was certain that her face looked... familiar...

I return a small smile, but then turn my attention back to the Window beside me. She didn't try to bother me for the rest of the journey.

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Pulling out my planner i see that swimming was fourth lesson. Good, there should be enough time to attempt to forge a note off my mum allowing me not to attend swimming.

I wouldn't usually do anything like that, but I honestly wasn't thinking straight after the repeated bad occurrences that kept happening to me.

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I check the time. It was half way through third lesson already, and I hadn't even forged a note.

I had thought about just 'bunking off' but then questions would be raised and my mother would be informed - I really didn't need that right now.

But, I couldn't do swimming. Not after what happened last night.

I didn't really realise how long I had been thinking for until I heard the familiar, unnerving tone of the buzzer ringing.

Hearing everybody moving around me, I jump and quickly stand up to pack my things away . Swimming time.

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I got to the PE corridor, and feel my palms sweat as I overhear the people muttering around me. Were they talking about Me? I don't know. But it didn't matter, that's what it felt like.

I walk briskly to the changing rooms, shivering as I feel the students' judgemental stares burning into me. I didn't turn around when I got in. Not once.

I don't need their sympathy. I didn't need them to crowd around me and feebly attempt to comfort me. I needed to be alone, I didn't need to be here. I have never needed to be here.

And to be honest with you, I have never wanted to be here.

\(o3o)/

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