Lorehana: The Papal Prophecy

The Totally-Not-Exposition Dump

"Mama!" Lil' Jimmy wailed. "I don't wanna sleep!" Lil' Jimmy's mother tucked her saccharine (albeit bratty) son into bed. She draped his blankets over his delicate body and fluffed his stuffy pillow.
"MAMA!" Lil' Jimmy howled again. His mother, however, continued to smile. In a few seconds, if he kept at it, she would smother his delicate little body with that stuffy pillow. It would not be my fault, she rationalized. It would be that rotten kid's doing.
"MAMA!" Lil' Jimmy cried, tears welling his rather abnormal face. Lil' Jimmy's mother clenched the pillow and snapped her head towards her spawn of a son. This was the day, she thought. The day I kill Jimmy.
She laughed through her toothy grin, "Why don't I tell you a bed time story, Lil' Jimmy?" Her son's eye lit up and that frown somehow did a one-eighty in a flash.
"Yay!" he cheered. "Which one?!"
Lil' Jimmy's mother cooed, "The one about the gods, my son."
"Wait. But I don't wanna hear that-"
"Haha! Too bad, you little shit. We need to exposition dump this convoluted lore anyway!"
Lil' Jimmy's mother clapped her hands together in excitement and switched the lights off. The room plunged in umbra. No sound—no people—no light—no connection to the outside. Only to the pure forces of nature; the one that the gods intended.

"In the beginning, three gods ruled the Heavens and the Earth. The absolute ruler of reality, Kaela, practically transcended everythingness and nothingness. Her holy mother, Mia, protected Kaela in times of need. She also could not close her legs and had too many illegitimate children, but you are too young to understand that. The last deity reigned besides Kaela. While Kaela maintained the good of the world, her counter controlled reality's darkness. This other god was to be only know in harsh and dark whispers; his name was Erick.

"Kaela and Erick, although they balanced each other out, probably did not like one another very much. Erick really wanted to touch Kaela (sexually or nonsexually—Erick was a very confusing person) to piss Mia off. Kaela, being literally God, decided she did not want none of that so she sealed Erick into the darkest depths of Heck, unable to touch Kaela. From that day on, Erick swore vengeance against the Heavenly gods and their beloved humans. The end."

Lil' Jimmy's mother flipped the switch to light. A humble snore droned within the room—Lil' Jimmy had fallen asleep. Seeing her little angel/devil/mistake at peace left a soft smile onto her face. Of course she knew a story as generic and boring as that tale would put anyone to sleep. The mother crept out the bedroom and sauntered down the halls. As she traversed, the glimmering stars—the grinning Heavens—caught her eyes. It enamored her—The celestial divinity resonated within her. Although Erick swore to take revenge on humanity, she felt the world was in harmony. Everything seemed, as she would put it, right.
Today was December 31; tomorrow is to be a new year. She wondered, what does the world have in store for us then?