I just said goodbye to my family. They could only go as far as the security check. We hugged for several minutes. Mom cried. Dad kept clearing his throat like he was trying to hide his tears. Even my brother got emotional. Hard to believe, I know! Dante is usually such a dick!
I feel guilty for being so happy. I'm sitting here waiting for my flight, barely able to contain my joy. I'll miss my family, but I've always felt a bit like an alien who was dropped in among them to observe. I never wanted the things they did. I guess I'm looking for the Beldar to my Prymaat. Definitely someone who'll get my obscure SNL references.
The big shocker today was seeing Jake there. I know he's Dante's best friend and sort of like part of the family, but he got up at 8 AM on a Saturday to see me off??? I will not read anything into that. He probably thinks of me as a little sister. It felt amazingly good to be held by him. He's so big and strong. Did it show on my face how much I lust after him? I've wanted him since I knew what wanting was.
In high school I saw a photo of a naked man and ever since then I have fantasized about Jake's body. I know what I'll be thinking about on the plane ride. Hours and hours of fantasies. Ice water, please!
YOU ARE READING
Porn Star Journal: An R-Rated Account of an X-Rated Life
Aktuelle LiteraturThis is the totally made up story of a non-existent porn star named Angel. She is the main character in my Naughty Holidays book series, free on Kindle Unlimited. In this story, I explore the emotional journey of a young actress who stumbles into th...