Smart Girls Think Fast (An Artemis Fowl Fanfic)

Chapter 1

Disclaimer: This fanfiction is based on Eoin Colfer's "Artemis Fowl" and I own none of the characters, except for Jade Haneu. The plot is also mine.

______

Fowl Manor, Dublin. A week ago:

Butler drove the car down the driveway to the manor. He felt a sense of accomplishment in doing what he wanted to do for days. Something had been troubling him. Recently, things had been disappearing around the Fowl Manor, money, various items –vases, spoons, statues- his Sig Sauer. A few nights ago, the power went out, but when Butler investigated after about 10 minutes when the back-up power wouldn’t start, he found that the power lines had been cut. Checking the back-up generator, he found that it had been messed up beyond repair. Wires had been cut, valves had been removed - and the missing components were nowhere to be seen.

He had also thought he heard some movement in the house, but had dismissed it as his hearing. He was getting old. Butler had been the only one in the manor when it had occurred: Juliet was touring, Artemis and Angeline Fowl were in Haven, watching Artemis’s recovery. But he was still a bit troubled, so he had decided to write to Minerva.

He had just come back from the village after posting a letter to Minerva and was putting some groceries into the pantry when he heard a slight intake of breath. Instantly, he dropped the celery and whirled around to face the attacker, pulling out his gun in the process. Nothing. Butler backed up against the fridge and waited. Suddenly, he heard a voice in his ear, ‘You shouldn’t have posted that Butler.’

Butler’s last thought was, ‘Fairies!’ when there was a quiet buzz sound and a flash of light, as Butler’s body hit the ground and was dragged away…

***

Paradiso Chateau, Tourrettes sur Loup. Now:

Dear Minerva,

Big day today! Lately I have been reading a lot of fiction like you told me to. Artemis is fine. Caviar is still his favourite meal. Kings was my favourite book out of the three you gave me to read. Lately, I haven’t read so much, I confess. I need to get back to the other book you gave me. Going to the book store soon! Have to buy the other book you recommended. Today is very busy. Overall, there is a lot to do today. Natalie is coming for dinner. Botanist. After dinner, shopping in the city. Cities are too crowded for Artemis though. Knowing him, he prefers to stay in his study.

Butler

Minerva read the letter, taking in the unconnected sentences and the strange language, instantly decoding and translating it.

BLACKLIGHTONBACK

Minerva turned on the black light and read:

Dear Minerva,

Sorry I haven’t written to you in a while. It’s just that there has been so much going on, and have only just managed to write to you after the conclusion of our latest adventure. So much has happened. In short:

You know how Artemis stole some fairy magic and got out of Limbo? Well, apparently, this brought on what is known as Atlantis Complex, or multiple-personality disorder. He is now recovering, but still switches between himself and his alternate personality, Orion. He is also obsessed with counting things, though it is getting less and less now. I will tell you another time.

There’s something strange going on here. I can’t really say what. Every time I go outside I feel like I’m being watched. And things have been going missing. Last night, a vase went missing, and a few weeks ago, a diamond earring. One of my guns that I keep on my table disappeared too, but I know I left it there. Yesterday, all the power went out. When I went to investigate, I saw one of the main power lines had been cut.