Is Your OC A Mary Sue

Echo

Echo is an possessiver or a demon he was created in hell like Bees or flies demons of his kind are made in swarms there are thousands of them made each year and as soon as they are born there given a title.

There are four  main titles..

•Guard#1
•spirits #2
•possessiver#3
•souls #4

Guards are the highest ranks and is the most respected rank in hell,as a guard it's yours duty to protect the under ground and Satan.

Spirits are second there are your common ghost haunting and there actually deliver warning to the mortals that there upsetting Satan or that there in danger. Being a spirit means means you can have your own visual body and bat like wings.

possessivers are what it sounds like they possess people so they kill themselves to that Satan can eat there souls.- possessivers are trapped in the mortals head and its like having voices in your head to drive you into madness. possessivers take the form of the human there possessing.

Souls are the lowest rank and is treated terribly they are forced to clean after other ranks and they get tortured by there minds. You only get into this rank if you are deemed as weak or your simply a lost soul tripped in limbo.

Echo doesn't have an age since he's a possessiver and there not given a name or age only a number. Echo's number was
"609".

The name "echo" was given to him by the human he possesses since he trapped in the humans head,the human states that echo voice sounds like echoes ringing in his head. Echo has also named his human since the human is on the brink of madness and has uncontrollable twitches his name to echo his twitch but his real name his  Brian smith"

First off, there are a few grammatical and spelling errors in your sentences that should be a easy fix. The oc isn't bad but it isn't the most original or greatest either. Sounds like the typical "I'm from hell oc". But I like the ideas of 1,2,3 and 4.

"Echo visual appearance..

he has black hair like twitch and has red eyes which is common with possessivers. And wears the same clothes as twitch which is a red t-shirt with a white stripe across it but echo doesn't like the t-shirt he's forced to wear so he wears a black hoodie over it but he never zips it up. He wears black trousers and vans.

When he has enough power to over take twitch's body he's claims to twitches friends that's he's twitches twin brother named Kevin smith.

His personality is that he's snappy and loud but he's cocky and thinks he's all high and mighty.he has a hard time expressing kindness towards others."

I'm confused of who this twitch character is? In the previous thing above it mentions no twitch or Kevin smith. Unless I'm reading things wrong. Also a few grammatical and spelling errors that are easy fixes. Try going into more detail about the character ,and explain who these other two characters (twitch and Kevin) are. Find someway to tie loose ends.

Mary Sue rating - %30 d