Our Messed Up Thing

chapter 10

After the exhausting day, I planned on looking for Archie but decided to pass just in case he isn't in the mood. I decided to go to Target just to look around.
Shopping will distract me.

When reaching Target I decide to buy a shirt.

I'm walking around the T-Shirt section when I spot this employee with weird ginger curls coming out his head and teeth that might probably fall off any second because of their size. He has approached this couple asking them if they need any help. They simply walk away from him with creeped out expressions. Poor thing.

I spot this NASA shirt which I find quite cute. Everyone is wearing them nowadays. However, I can't keep focus. My eyes keep turning towards the innocent looking Target employee who is asking people if they need anything. But everyone keeps turning him down because of his appearance and voice. I bet he's harmless so I approach him.

"Hi," I say. He turns around surprised at someone finally wanting his attention.

"Hi," He replies with a goofy voice, making me giggle.

"I actually need help. Could you help me out-" I try saying however he interrupts me.

"Of course, of course, of course, of course, of course!" He exclaims. I don't think he interrupted me out of rudeness, he might just have a mental problem. Literally. "Whatcha need, m'man?" He asks, saying m'man instead of m'lady. But he's harmless.

"Well, um, I need to create an outfit." I explain.

"Oh, cheese would look good on you!" He shouts, creeping me out a little. However I decide to hold on out of pity.

"Yeah, um... Cheese is... Pretty." He starts nodding at an incredible speed. "It's definitely... original." I add.

"Yeah, yup, yes, oui, sí!" He affirms, in too many languages. He is definitely mentally ill. Poor thing.

"So, cheese it is." I pick out a yellow shirt. "Is this a nice shade of cheese?" I ask. I would be teasing but he wouldn't get the joke.

He crosses an arm across his chest while the other has his chin resting on it in a thinking position. "It's too 'apple'y." He states. Leaving me confused.

"'Apple'y?" I ask.

"Yes, apple-like." He explains, without really explaining anything.

"Ah true," I decide to simply agree instead of messing with an ill man's mind. It's a shame though, he seems quite young and he would be quite handsome if it weren't for his hairstyle, his teeth, and his goofy glasses. I am surprised however when he lets out a little giggle out of nowhere. "What's up?" I ask, confused but still looking around the clothes.

"The floor." He responds. Wouldn't it be the sky?

"Hah, that's really funny." I decide to reply. There's no point in arguing with this poor guy.

"I am a really funny guy." He brags.

"Yes, you are." I answer, laughing. It's good to relax a little after this tense day.

"Do you like me?" He asks directly.

"Umm..." I am trying to be cautious. "Yeah sure, why not?" I giggle.

"Good. I like me too. I also like pizza." He randomly says.

"Who doesn't?" I answer, looking for an S of the NASA shirt, however I have no such luck. "Hey, um, Bernard," I read from his tag.

"It is pronounced Berdiglund." He says with a very, very, very big smile.

"Oh, sorry, Berdiglund, is there an S of the NASA shirt?" I ask nicely.

"Yes." He stands there frozen. I look around out of instinct to see if anyone is watching us.

"Um, can you get it for me please?" I give him a smile trying to be as nice as possible to this retarded dude.

"I'm too lazy." He says, suddenly sitting down on the floor. "Sit." He orders inexpressively.

"Okay..." I say after a long pause and sit cross-legged in front of him.

"What's your name?" He asks randomly.

"My name is Gigi." I reply.

"Do you remember mine, Gina?" I cringe at him getting my name wrong after me just telling him but I let it go.

"Yes, Berdiglund." I utter.

"Excuse me?" He asks offended.

"I'm sorry, did I get it wrong?" I remember him telling me that that's how it's pronounced.

"Uh, YEAH! I'm Bernard. It says it clearly on my tag." He shouts.

"Right, sorry. My mistake." I'm trying hard not to be rude. I have to keep in mind the fact that he isn't well mentally.

"You are really pretty." He's suddenly nice, reminding me of Archie's change in mood. What if he ends up like this guy?

"Thank you, so are you." I kindly smile.

"Yeah I know," He replies. "Would you go out with me?" He asks when I get up to look for something else to buy. I can't just stay here talking to a retarded stranger.

"I uh, I mean, I would. But as friends you know? We barely know each other. I'd like to get to know you first as a friend. Then we'll see what happens." I think about this guy going to a psychologist but it doesn't seem like he has one. I make a decision and I pray that it's easy to contact psychologists in L.A. "Here's my number. Whenever you're free, just call me." I offer with the idea of setting him up with a psychologist.

"You would go out with me?" He says while his voice slightly changes.

"We'll see." I reply.

"You are really pretty," He compliments me again.

"Thank you, so are you." I decide to reply the same thing as before. I am now walking around the store and Bernard is following me.

"You are really pretty," He repeats.

"You already-" I decide against telling him off for repeating the same thing twice and just go with the flow. "Thank you, so are you."

"You are really pretty," This is getting really weird.

"Thank you, so are you." I remember to go with the flow.

"You are really pretty. She is really pretty!" He points at me and shouts that last bit capturing almost the entire store's attention.

"Thank-" I start.

"You are really pretty!" He interrupts.

Oh. God.