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Sorry to disappoint you guys with just an authors note, but I felt like I needed to put this here.

I am so so so sorry I haven't been writing this
I'm...going through tough times. Not grief or depression, just...severe anxiety for my health.

Angsty violent stuff does NOT help with that so, as much as I like that stuff, I don't want to see or write it while I'm like this, so unfortunately I probably won't update for a while. I am so so sorry.

I'm going to see a doctor tomorrow (hopefully) and that should help establish the fact that I am healthy (and if something IS wrong, hopefully they can fix it so I'll feel better)

But like, this anxiety is making me not be able to sleep until way past midnight, and my heart hurts, my mom tells me chest pains happen when you have bad anxiety so I hope it's just that and not an actual problem with my heart.

She's thinking of getting me therapy too, so hopefully that will help.

For some reason, I mostly just get this anxiety at night...it's really strange!

But yeah, so sorry to disappoint, I hope I feel better. I love you all for supporting me! See you later!

EDIT: okay so I'm going to see a doctor tomorrow, but my mom says I have hypochondria. It's basically just health anxiety, and thinking small things are symptoms of some horrible thing. It does sound like what I have...but I still want to see a doctor. I mean, apparently treatments for hypochondria include doctors telling you you're okay, therapy, and other similar stuff. For some reason knowing that I'm a hypochondriac is making me cry but idk why. Like are these sad tears?? What are they. I'm still very worried for my health so even though it's probably just hypochondria I still can't wait to see a doctor just in case... Soo yeah I hope I get over all this soon, I can't even stand my science class anymore because of this. So hopefully the pain in my back is nothing serious! Ouch it hurts. See you later

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