Thinking of You [ON HOLD]

Chapter One

I could hear the rain drops crashing down onto the cold hard pavement. Like bullets being fired from the dull grey sky above. I slowly pulled myself from my spot beside the vast window which covered the entire length of the apartment. Our apartment. I shared an impressive looking apartment with my boyfriend. Josh. Just the thought of his name terrified me and sent cold shivers down my spine. You see, Josh has...anger issues. Always has. Well, since I've known him he has. I'm too scared to ask about his past. I learnt my lesson the last time. Never again.

My phone sung out Whitney Houston's 'I Will Always Love You'. I smiled instantly knowing who was calling. Liam. Liam Payne. Yes, the Liam Payne, 1/5 of the internationally famous one Direction.  To me though, he was simply Liam. My best friend since birth.  He had set my ring tone to remind me that even though he was off touring the world with the rest of One Direction, he would always be there for me.

I eagerly slid my phone out of my jeans pocket, not wanting to miss my chance to speak to Liam.

"LIAM!!!!" I practically screamed down the phone.

"ELISE!!!!" He replied with the same enthusiasm.

"How ya doin' then Payno? Haven't spoken to you in ages!" It was true. It had been at least 2 months and I missed him like crazy.

"Sorry El, I've been super busy. What with tour and everything. Buuuut, the boys and I have a day off-"

"I'll be over in 5 minutes!" I cut him off before he could say anything else. I could hear him chuckle on the other end of the line.

"So, I'll see you in an hour then yeah?" I sighed. Liam was always making fun of how late I always was.

"Don't be a dick Li! You remember what happened at the beach when we were 5? 'Cos I do. It would be such a shame if it 'accidently' got spread on Twitter..."

"NO! You wouldn't!" I laughed at the unmistakable worried tone in his voice.

"You and I both know I would! Now let me get on! Otherwise it really will be an hour before you see me!" I hung up my phone and smiled to myself. Of course I was joking. He knew that.  It was the nature of our friendship, just how we were. To anyone else it would seem, at times, as if we hated each other. Others, as if we were in love. Neither assumptions were the case, we were best friends. Nothing more. Nothing less. And I liked it that way.

************************

My dark hair swung around my shoulders as I made my way to Liam's apartment, the rain cascading around my umbrella, usual for Britain. I made my way through the almost maze-like streets of London, only just managing not to run into any busy London people doing busy London people things. Serious business.

I wore my black skinny jeans along with a white blouse black boots and my signature black leather jacket. This was my look. I was comfortable. My brown eyes were lined with black winged eyeliner. Another signature of mine.  The rest of my makeup was simple. Bit of powder, blusher and a few flicks of mascara. Some foundation to cover up the….bruises.

But no one had to know about that. Did they?

When I finally found myself at Liam’s apartment, I felt almost….nervous. I had no clue why.

Maybe it was because I hadn’t seen Liam and the other boys for so long?

No. Can’t be. I’d known the boys for ages; Liam even longer.

Maybe I wasn’t nervous at all and it was just because I hadn’t eaten breakfast that day?

No. These were definitely nerves.

I knew in the back of my mind, but didn’t want to admit it, that the nerves were because I didn’t want Liam to know about my bruises. He couldn’t.

The truth was that Josh beat me. Often. I was like a punch bag for him; ready whenever he needed to let out his anger. I couldn’t tell anyone. I was too afraid, plus Josh had made me promise never to tell anyone. Well….more like threatened that he would make it worse if I did.

You always hear about these people who get abused by their boyfriends. But never in a million years would you think it would happen to you.

But it did. It happened to me.

Just as I never thought my parents would leave me.

But they did.

Liam was there for me whenever I needed him; I knew that.

I just didn’t know how to tell him or how he would react. I knew exactly how Josh would react; and I didn’t like it. Not one bit.

I climbed the stairs to Liam’s apartment. I chose the stairs because elevators were for pussies. That and the fact it was out of order….

I soon made it to the right floor and made my way towards my bestfriend. I didn’t even bother knocking on the door anymore, I knew Liam like he was another part of me just with a different body.

“Hey El!” Liam cried, rushing to give me a hug.

“Hiya! It’s been practically forever since I’ve seen you!” I replied with the same excited tone.

The boys had been away for 4 months on tour around the world. I had hardly had a chance to speak to any of them. I missed them all like crazy. In the corner of my eye I could see Louis crossing the living room to see what all the commotion was about.

“Sup Lou”

“Oh…Yeah…Hi.” For some reason Louis was acting a bit weird towards me. Strange.

“Do I get a hug or what…?” Louis awkwardly stepped forward as if he really didn’t want to hug me.

“Nice to see you El” He said as he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into a hug. For some reason it felt better. Safer.

Why was I feeling like this?

“So El the other boys are out at the movies, they’ll be back later. Me and Lou were about to go out to the shopping centre, wanna join?” Out of the corner of my eye I could see Louis looking at me kinda hopeful. He was sending me weird mixed messages. Cold one minute then the next he wants me to go out shopping with them.

We’d always been good friends, ever since I met the boys when One Direction got put together. He was hilarious; always up for a laugh. He made me feel okay and happy. Even after I’d just fought with Josh.

But now he was kinda making me feel uncomfortable. As if his eyes were burning into my skin like Superman.

Caught up in my thoughts, I didn’t hear Liam ask the question a second and even third time.

“El! Elise!” Liam’s voice pulled me out of my thoughts.

“Uh, yeah. Sure. Let’s go then.” I shook my head as if I was trying to shake my weird thoughts out of my mind. Liam grabbed his jacket and headed towards the door. Louis went to follow but I pulled him to the side before he could pass.

“Urhmm, Lou? Can I talk to you for a sec?”  Louis pulled a confused face as he nodded.

“Yeah? Wassup, we should really get going. Liam’s waiting.”

“Why have you been acting weird since I got here” I questioned.

“I….Urhh….Dunno what you’re talking about?” He managed to stutter out.

“I’m talking about how this is the most you’ve said to me since I arrived and how you won’t make eye contact with me!” I half shouted. Getting quite angry now. How could he not know what he’s doing?

“Listen. Maybe I’m not having a good day. Huh? Not everyone can be happy all the time!” And with that, he was gone.