Mist on the Moon

Angry with him?

"Cara, I know you have had feelings for Justin. His daring rescue of you could only have been attempted by one willing to risk his life for you. I have come to know him well and trust him with my most prized possession. He is a fine man, and a royal knight."

"Trent, please don't say anymore. I am betrothed to you." She hoped he wouldn't continue on with this line of thought.

"You were betrothed to a whole man."

Cara was getting more and more agitated with how he was going on. Justin came to her mind, and in truth she could have cared for him. Things were different now. She seized on something else that came to her mind. "Trent, things have changed for both me and Justin. I have become fixed on you and for me there is no turning back. And Justin. . .Justin has turned to Gianna and she very much to him" After thus saying, she looked closely at him, and not seeing any change in his demeanor she suddenly had another thought, a terrible thought. "Trent, is it me? Do you not want me anymore?" She turned away from him to hide the tears that had suddenly come to her eyes.

"No, Cara, that is not it at all," he hastened to reassure her. "I love you. You know that, don't you?"

Cara turned back to face him, and then seeing the sincerity in his voice and eyes she went to hold him. "I love you too, Trent."

Still held in her arms, he spoke softly. "Don't you see that I want what is best for you, Cara?"

She straightened up from him, sorry that he was still not convinced. She looked unbelieving at him as he continued to talk.

"Even when the four of us have been together, you, me, Justin and Gianna, I have seen him glancing at you. He might like Gianna, and I think she really does care for him, but you would be his first choice. That I know."

Cara stood there not knowing what to say. Head down, she slowly shook her head no, telling him without words that he was wrong, completely wrong. He might be right about Justin, but not about her. Finally, she lifted her head to look at him directly. "Trent, if you do not want me, just say so." With that she turned on her heel and walked quickly from the room and back toward her apartment.

Arriving there, she was engulfed by feelings. Did he truly not want her? Was he being so noble that he did not wish her to have to share a life with a "cripple" as he called himself? And really, as she thought more about it, was everything so assured that he would never regain the use of his leg? He was so foolish, she thought. He probably had never been sick a day in his life and now he thinks he will be an invalid forever. Men! She thought. What is it about them that make them act that way? Their pride? But then again the thought crept into her mind that maybe for some unknown reason he didn't want her. That was the hardest thought. That was the thought that made her cry.

But soon she realized she shouldn't do that to herself. She shouldn't let him do that to her. Her dismay turned to irritation. The prince had chosen her, had taken her away from her loving family, from the small kingdom she knew and loved and now was telling her he didn't want her. All because of an injury? It was all so stupid and unbelievable to her. She scarcely knew what to think. 

One thing she resolved to do. She would not visit him. It was too hard to go through that again with him. She would wait. Maybe he would be stronger and not so distressed by his injury when she came to see him the next time. Maybe he would be different. Maybe he would miss her. Maybe he would once again be the man she had come to love.

It was late, and she needed sleep. She removed her garments and put on a nightgown. Slipping under the blanket, she rested her head on the pillow. Prayer came, but unfortunately not sleep. She tossed and turned. So much to think about. Finally, in the morning she saw the light of day streaming through the high window. Glad she had at least slept a little, she decided she would go for breakfast.

Everything in the great hall seemed to be as usual, an ordinary morning. In general, people still seemed to be in good spirits, likely because the threat of the Magyar incursion was mostly over. She took her own food from the long table, something that was becoming a habit for her at least for breakfast. She regreted that she still knew only a few people, and no one she knew very well was there. Then, Justin and Gianna walked in, talking to each other. She spied them and turned away. She didn't know if they would prefer to be alone together or if they would join her where she sat alone at the table.

They too got their own food and came bearing their trenchers to join her. After what Trent had told her about Justin, Cara felt a little uneasy, but she would attempt to make small talk. "Hi, you two. Lovely morning."

They sat down with her at table and Gianna said, "It is. I feel so free again now that they're gone."

 As they ate together and talked Cara couldn't help but wonder if what Trent had said about Justin was true. Did he still look at her in that certain way? Then she saw it, or did she? When he spoke to her did his eyes seem to linger on hers? Nonsense, she said to herself. I am imagining this. Or was she? She looked away.

* * *

Trent knew exactly, why Cara had not visited him. He missed her. Yet he believed he was doing the right thing. Cara was a girl full of life and she should not be saddled with a cripple. He was doing this for her, as much as it hurt him. But it was not easy. Many came to visit him and he tried to talk to them as though nothing had changed in his life. The hardest time for him was late at night when Cara had come to talk to him alone. But the night before and now again on this night she didn't appear to be coming. Time passed so slowly.

Cara had not visited Trent at all the day before. She learned from Gianna that he was getting better, though she did say there was something not right with his leg. But otherwise, he was eating and was even able to leave his bed for a short time before quickly tiring and returning to it. All symptoms of a man regaining his health thought Cara.

She found it so hard to stay away from him. She was angry with him really, and if he didn't want her then she shouldn't want him. That is what she felt in her mind. Her heart was telling her something completely different. Yet she found it impossible to tell her heart what her mind was thinking. She thought that she should refrain from seeing Trent again this day, but as the long hours of evening wore on her resolve began to weaken.

* * *

Trent rued his leg, the one he couldn't move. If only I was whole, he thought, I would welcome Cara into my life. In frustration, for the umpteenth time he tried as hard as he could to move his leg. Feeling something, he looked down at his leg. Still lying on the bed he tried again. Yes! he thought to himself. It moved, if only a little!

He heard footsteps in the outer room. It was so late, surely it wasn't Cara. Yet how much he wished it could be her coming to see him.

Don't know about you, but I feel so much emotion when writing scenes like this.  Hope you are enjoying. Anyone have thoughts on where this might be going? Sometimes I know you have some useful ideas to include in the story.